The Christians Are Coming!!

After spending a whole day hopping from airport to airport trying to get to Nicaragua, I realized 3 things.  

1.) I am not a fan of anything “airport”.  They are frustrating and inconvenient and I don’t enjoy being rushed from one counter to another trying to make sure that everything is as it should be.  And I hate being told when I can and can’t pee.

2.) Starbucks is everywhere…which is amazing when you’re traveling.

3.) When a Christian group is taking a missions trip, you can spot them from a hundred miles away.  Why? Bright colored t-shirts exclaiming that these are the “First Baptist Church Crusaders” on “Mission Nicaragua 2010”.  Hard to miss alongside the socks with sandals, girls in skirts (because that’s what Christian girls wear), and pleated Dockers.  And I understand the use of similar shirts or hats when traveling.  Groups are easier to keep together and locate.

Don’t take my sarcasm the wrong way.  I think that missions trips are important and that at some time or another, everyone (not just the Christians) should go on one.  They will change your life if you let them.  I have been on them, and I love going out and serving.  The problem is that we make an entrance that screams “I’m here to save the day!!”, and the “We came to love you” part gets lost behind tracks and graphic tees that are all the same.  We get wrapped up in making sure that we look the part of the good, American Christian, that we forget how little it means to those you are going to serve.  They see your agenda.

My husband joked that the Christians in the airport that were heading out to other countries were similar to the British who marched up the Eastern Coast at the start of the Revolutionary War.  They are marching right down the avenue wearing their bright red outfits, weapons in hand, giant crosses on their uniforms.  Easy to spot and know what they’re here for.  And then there’s Paul Revere riding as fast as he can to announce to the sleeping world that “The British are coming! The British are coming!!”  Not exactly the entrance the British were hoping for, I would guess. 

Is that how we look to those we are trying to serve?  A bunch of soldiers in uniform marching in with our Bibles and quick answers, ready for battle and wanting everyone to know it?  Sometimes all that’s missing is Paul Revere riding ahead to warn everyone so that they can brace for impact.  Again, don’t take my words wrong.  I’m not saying this is a representation of everyone who goes on a missions trip.  And I’m not saying that we are interested in marching in like soldiers ready for battle.  Many people go on missions trips to serve and love and take care of orphans.  Some go because they’ve never been out of the country and Mexico sounds like they have good beaches.  There are those that go out of obligation.  And there are those that go because the rest of the world is “lost” and they have to convert the masses.  To say that no one has an agenda when they are on a mission trip is both naïve and incorrect.  Everyone has an agenda.  The question is what is it and can the people see it coming.

I think the question I beg to ask is why must Christians (specifically the American ones) present themselves in a way that screams “You’re lost and I have all the answers”?  Why can’t we come in and defy the norm.  Instead of standing out because we look like a parade, why can’t we let our actions and our love speak for us?  What’s with the need to compensate?  I find it hard to believe that someone like Jesus was going around and telling people about his Father with a group of followers dressed in uniform.  He simply loved them.  He met them where they were at and never looked down on anyone.  He just was. 

So instead of heading out to other countries looking like a cheesy church group, why not try just being yourself and being the Church.  If being yourself includes black socks with sandals, then so be it. Just don’t go looking like an actor playing a role.  People want relationships.  They want you to get to know who they are and what their struggles are.  They want to be loved and prayed for.  And if you love your neighbor, as God commanded, it will speak volumes more than your cross necklaces worn as identification.

Jesus commands us to do two things: Love God. Love people.  Everything else falls into place around those 2 commands.  Don’t try to overcompensate. 

The Perspective of Reality.

My husband and I are taking off to Nicaragua to perform for the next couple of days.  It was a last-minute opportunity that we were thrilled about taking.  Though we have both spent time in Central America, Nicaragua has yet to be one of the places that we've visited.  And despite the threat of hurricane-type weather, we are stoked!

Ever since we first went out of the country together to El Salvador in 2005, my husband and I try to take the time for at least 6-8 weeks outside of the States serving and relaxing.  We have realized that it's necessary for us to leave the States to keep our focus and to balance our lives.  

I will be the first person to say that I love America.  I love the rights we are allowed to exercise daily that so many other nations can’t, and I love that we are a nation that embraces uniqueness and freedom.  However, as an American, it's easy to lack perspective on reality.  There are millions of people all over the world who live on less than 1% of what we do.  There are millions of displaced children because of war, famine, AIDS, and other manageable illnesses who sleep and live in fear daily.  There are millions of people imprisoned because of faith and lack of faith everywhere.  There are millions of women and children trafficked every year to labor camps, sweat shops, and into sex slavery.  Poverty, lack of freedoms, hunger, and fear is a daily reality for most of the world.  Yet here in America, we get upset that we don't have enough money for that 2000 square foot home in suburbia; that we can't get financing for that BMW; and that we have to pay for our own healthcare.  We, the people of the wealthiest country in the world, are busy whining for handouts and payouts because that's what we deserve, all the while forgetting about the reality of everyone else.  And you wonder why Americans have a bad rap in other countries?

When you leave America for another country, you have the ability to gain immeasurable amounts of perspective if you are paying attention.  If you realize all of the freedoms that you have, you are less likely to whine about the small things and instead be thankful.  For me, every time I head to another location outside of the States, I take the time to listen and see the things around me.  I ask questions about culture, food, and customs in an attempt to understand the people better.  And I try (though sometimes failing miserably) to learn a little bit of the language. You would be surprised at how valued the locals feel when you sample their crazy food and try to communicate with them in their own language.  You are showing both honor and respect, as well as that it's not all about you and your preferences.  And ultimately, people will open their lives and homes to you, more often than not, helping you learn and become a better person.  

You can gain the perspective of reality anywhere in the world.  You don't have to be in a third world country to see how the rest of the world operates.  I would challenge anyone to put yourself out there and open up your mind and heart to all of the things that this world both offers and needs.  And I would challenge anyone to take a trip, with that open mind and heart, to anywhere else in the world and take in the culture and the people.  You will realize so much about yourself and what's really important in life.  It will force you to slow down and take time to smell the proverbial roses. There’s a reason why in Latin America, people take a siesta in the middle of the day and don’t stress out about being on time….anywhere. (even though it still drives me batty!) There’s a reason why in Eastern Asia people socialize and eat food together in open markets all day and night.  They love company and see it as a healthy part of everyday life.  And just like those in Latin America…they don’t mind taking their time.  (maybe we should see the trend?)

Just for the record, I haven’t always had perspective.  Instead, I had done a great job of building a bubble around my life and filling it with the things that mattered to no one else but  me.  They were selfish and self-serving, mattering very little at the end of the day.  I had made my life about my own comfort, worrying regularly that I didn’t have what it took, that I would never have enough, and that no one could possibly like me unless I had all of those things that “matter” to the world.  How wrong was I.  After spending those 10 days in El Salvador, I realized that there is huge world out there full of people who love deeply, work hard, and don’t drive a white Mini convertible.  But they did have one thing that I didn’t: Joy.  I had all of the things that I could have wanted at the time, yet I was empty and unhappy.  I wanted the joy that they had.  The joy that was genuine and found in the simplest of things. 

Over time, I have traveled to 10 more countries, and have gained valuable perspective on things that matter to the world and that here in America we have a tendency to overlook and understate because they are not our reality.  The statistics are staggering and you can find the numbers anywhere, but when you look in the eyes of a child bought and sold for sex, in the eyes of a poor mother trying to keep her children fed and clothed, felt the touch of a blind orphan, and seen the smiles of the forgotten, the nice cars and clothes and vacations will melt away and become nothing more than a vapor. 

Jesus commanded us to take care of the widows and the orphans.  And more importantly to love our neighbor as ourselves.  Just because they don’t live next door or are part of our immediate group of friends does not mean that they are not our neighbors.  If they are human, they are our neighbors and loved by God.

So what is your perspective of reality, and what will you do about it?

Just Another Blog Post.

If I were to be completely honest with you, I would tell you that I am writing this post because I want to...not because I have some sort of profound content to discuss or a rant that I would like to extend to the masses.  I just felt like blogging.  More like, I just felt like clearing my head.  

I have found blogging to be one of the most relaxing, invigorating, and pleasant things to have in my life.  I need it.  I'm not quite sure how I've managed to live so long without it.  I've always journaled, and on occasion I still do when it's a more private topic, but this is a whole new world for me.  (Insert "Aladdin" soundtrack here for nostalgic purposes)  I find blogging more than just a way to organize my thoughts and share my opinions.  It's a place of refuge.  It's a place to be honest with others and myself in a way that just is.  And I thrive here.  

I found out recently that there are people who get paid lots of money to blog, and I thought to myself, "What a perfect job for me!"  And then I realized that unless you are a celeb who blogs (legit blogging...not a manager or other staff member) or are writing about business, or are a mom blogger, you don't get paid.  And I am none of those things.  So no money here.  But even if it was for one fleeting moment, I wondered what it would be like to just be and be paid to do something I love.  And then I thought a little harder and realized that it's already a reality for me.  

I am a painter, a creator, an artist, an actress, a thinker, and a writer.  All of those thing I love and they all give me the opportunity to just be.  And I get paid for it.  Call it luck, but I call it choice.  We all have gifts and abilities that were bestowed on us.  Some of those gifts we call "hobbies", or "those things that I love that I don't get paid for".  Sometimes when I'm asked what I do and reply "artist", I am given that little smirk that says "a girl with her head in the clouds...just another starving artist".  Little do they know that there are few days that I hate my life (because my work is my life) and if you saw a picture of me, I'm clearly not starving. :)  I am free to do all of the things that I am good at and more.  And the choice was mine.  I could have very easily just sat around and wasted my life away crying "poor me", but what's the point?  I know too many people that are in jobs that they hate and refuse to get out of. Now, I understand that we all have to be responsible and take care of our bills, so there are those stepping blocks along the way.  I have had jobs that I hated just like anyone else.  But instead of just wishing for more, I sought out more. I created more opportunities to do what I love. And along the way I realized something very important: who I am.  

It's like a friend of mine who I've know most of my life who was smart enough to do anything.  After college, she got married and had a normal job.  But she had always loved photography, and she was good at it. But instead of just allowing it be a mere hobby, she did something about it. She started to take a lot of pictures and learned everything that she could about cameras, lighting, and lenses.  She went to sessions and conventions all over the States, and then she took her brilliant creativity and did what she does best: take pictures.  And I must say, she's one of the most talented (and sought after) photographers that I know, and if you're ever out in Southern California, she's your girl!  (Check out Katie Neal Photography) But the point is that she worked hard and followed her dreams.  She played her cards and capitalized on her strengths.  

So once again, here I am.  Writing down my thoughts and hoping that maybe something that I have to say will resonate with someone else.  Maybe there was someone else who just needed an extra push.  Just don't let it be just another blog post....

If You Ask Me Again, I'll Scream.

Dear People of this Universe:

I am not pregnant.  Just fat.  I hate when you ask me "When are you due?"  It is both awkward and embarrassing for both of us.  I'm not sure why you would have the audacity to ask such a horrible question in the first place. In the words of Brian Regan: "Don't guess that ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever..."  You apparently didn't have enough "ever"'s memorized.

I am working hard to correct this problem so that you won't ever be confused into thinking that again.  But in the meantime, if you ask or guess or tell someone else that you think that I am, I will not be happy. I will do everything in my power to make you feel as embarrassed as possible for even asking.  If I ever am pregnant, I will TELL YOU.  Just check Facebook and Twitter and this blog.  You won't have to guess.

Thanks,

One Very NOT Pregnant (and ticked off) Woman.

My Life In Emoticons

I find myself attaching emoticons to just about every text or email or Twitter update without even thinking.  More often than not, they are little smiley faces or the one with the winking eye (we call them "winky face").  But I've realized that as I attach those little emotion indicators, I don't really think about how I really feel.  I just attach them on a whim.  

We live in a world of social networking, instant communication, and blogging.  We throw our lives out there for the world to see, and follow the status updates of friends to make sure that we are kept in-the-loop.  I know that I'm guilty of posting status updates to Twitter and Facebook whether I'm in a good mood or a bad mood, oftentimes hoping for encouragement, a quick laugh, or someone to just empathize with me.  But as good intentioned as the 1000 people that are my "Friends" are, I never really feel like I can be truly authentic.  I continue to try and ride the line so that I press just enough to get a small reaction, but I'm not trying to piss anyone off.  But why?  Why I am so desperate for comments but not all that willing to be totally honest?  Why do I make smart-ass comments and then attach the little smiley to it so as to soften the blow?

I think that we have created a world where we beg for authenticity, but it's completely superficial.  We want to seem authentic, but our real motive is to post enough online to keep people semi-informed so that they don't forget that we exist.  I mean let's be honest...if you're not on Facebook or Twitter or have some sort of online presence, you don't exist.  People want to keep tabs and feel involved and if you're not there, then you become little more than a vapor.  

I had a conversation with some friends last night about a church that we had been attending.  It was amazing to find that we all had some of the same concerns and frustrations (which was why we had been on a church hiatus), and wanted so much more out of our experience there.  But we had all been silent, hiding behind smiles and excuses of being busy.  We had the opportunity to be honest, and we had shared only partial truth on occasion, or it was avoided at all costs in order to keep the waters calm. (I try to be more of silent type because of my opinionated personality).  But the four of us knew that in order for things to result in change, we needed to have a voice and be honest not only with ourselves, but others.  No more emoticons.

Is it possible to be completely authentic online, or even in person for that matter?  Or are we doomed to spend the rest of our lives hiding behind the smiley faces?  I'm not sure that it's possible to answer. So many of us have been burned by people, businesses, and churches that we don't know who or how to trust.  Because of this pseudo-relational world that we've created, we have a hard time living in reality. I do know, however, that I want a real community of people that knows that I am who I am, which means that some days will be amazing, and some will suck.  I don't want to be around people that talk behind my back, have alterior motives, or just plain old don't like me for me.  In a "how many friends/followers do you have" world, I find myself totally uninterested in "Keeping up with the Kardashians".  

So you can be a friend of mine of Facebook, or follow me on Twitter, or even read my blog, but know that I am attaching a disclaimer of sorts to all of those things and it looks something like this:

WARNING:

Opinions expressed here are the opinion of Kate Harris only. 

You are not obligated to agree or care either way.

Kate Harris strives for honesty and authenticity on Facebook, Twitter and her Blog.

If you don't like the way she does things, then there are plenty of people who exist in pseudo-reality that you are more than welcome to follow to make yourself feel better. 

Kate Harris will challenge herself and you, if you so choose.  

Follow her at your own risk.

If this doesn't suit you, then that's okay.  I'm just making sure that everyone is aware that my intentions are not piss off, but to strive for something more in this online (and not online) world.  And the next time you are having a horrible day, don't attach the smiley emoticon to your status.  Just be honest.  I'm no guru or psychologist, but I do know that when I'm honest with both myself and others, working through this thing called life gets just a little bit easier and has less surprises.  

Burn Baby Burn!

2010 is the year of changes in the Harris household.  We decided at the end of last year to make 2010 the year that we were gonna get healthy.  There was no doubt in our minds that we had put on the pounds and were having more and more difficulty keeping up with all the things we had in queue.  From performing, to painting, to loading and unloading, to just basic everyday activities, we were out of shape!

So we began our research at the local Barnes and Noble, looking for a little bit of guidance to get us a jump start on our new life.  I'm not sure if you've ever browsed the shelves at Barnes and Noble looking for health books, but they span at least 4 sections.  There are books on the South Beach diet, Atkins diet, liquid diets, master cleanses, and hundreds more in the category of get-slim-quick.  Nothing that we were really looking for since we wanted a lifestyle change to be healthy.  We wanted something that would helps us pick the right foods and exercise programs for our bodies (you have to remember that not everyone is the same) that would have a lasting effect.  Something that we could keep up for a long time.  Again, we found very little and left Barnes and Noble wondering what in the world we should be doing.

From friends and late-night infomercials, we had heard about a workout set that came in the form of DVD's.  I'm pretty sure that you've all heard of P90X.  Most people have one reaction to the workout, and that's "Holy crap! That stuff is so hard! I gave up after about 10 minutes."  But, since my husband and I are mildly competitive and always enjoy a challenge, we started our Craigslist hunt for a used set. Funny enough, there are dozens of these DVD sets available, many unopened.  We started out doing just the 45 minute Cardio X DVD, and found that though it was really difficult (I mean come on...we were out of shape!) we actually enjoyed it.  Slowly we added in the Kenpo X, and when we really felt ambitious: the Ab Ripper.  Again, it was difficult, but because January through April involves a lot of traveling, it was about all we could do.

Now insert healthy eating.  Harris, my husband, cut out fried foods, fast food, and tons of processed food.  I became a pescatarian, which means that I'm a vegetarian that eats seafood (mostly fresh fish), and cut out all soda and sweets.  There was a huge change in our physical appearance just from a small amount of working out 5 days a week and eating healthier than we had before.  By mid-February, I had lost about 5 pounds.  (My goal is closer to 50).  So we knew that we were on the right track, just needed to amp it up.

In March, we joined forces with a personal trainer named Michael Tugo.  He owns a studio in Green Hills called Body Sculpting.  This is when the real magic started to happen!  He challenged us to cut out diary, eat tons more greens, more protein for my husband, and no carbonation.  The less food was processed, the better.  We would be in the gym for at least an hour with him 3 days a week lifting weights and challenging our bodies.  On our free days, we were encouraged to do cardio for at least 30 minutes.  In the first 4 weeks, I lost 8 pounds.  I was stoked!  With the lack of dairy in my body and working really hard in the gym, I was feeling lighter and full of energy. We worked hard for 90 days, all the while touring.

Today, I have lost 20 pounds and 2 pants sizes.  I know that I still have a lot of hard work ahead of me, but it's doable and totally worth it!  Just looking at pictures of me from 90 days ago, it's hard to believe how bad and puffy I looked!  I had no idea! But again, I am hopeful and looking forward to what the next 90 days have in store for me!  If you think that there's some sort of "magic pill" that will make you lose weight, you're partially right.  There are thousands of "quick fix" diets that are just that: a quick fix.  They have no lasting power and will not make you a healthy person.  You can't eat whatever you want, whenever you want, and not exercise, and still think that you're going to lose weight.  It takes hard work.  It takes focus.  It takes a lifestyle change and willpower.  I know that I feel better right now then I have in years.  And I am enjoying my life all the more!

Burn, baby burn!

But what does it mean? (part 4)

"Liquid"

48x60

This is the largest canvas painting that I've done to-date. (The largest painting I've done was a commission for a 72x72) I had seen this giant canvas at the art supply store on more than one occasion and I had always said to myself that I wanted to paint something this big.  When I finally took the plunge and bought this giant piece, I let it sit in my studio for a good 2 weeks and I stared at it.  I wanted to make sure whatever it was that I painted would be new and creative. 

Now, to be completely transparent as an artist, I had no idea what I wanted to paint.  I was at a complete loss and thought I had actually run out of creativity!  I know that you can't really "run out" of creativity, but there was still a small side of me that panicked and wondered if this was going to be the end of my painting career.  Then I did something that's really hard for me to do: I let go.  I let go of the insecurities that I had as a novice painter (the idea that nothing is good enough) and just let my brain relax.  That's when I got the idea for "Liquid".

The background of the painting is a deep blue that was washed with a dark brown over the top of it.  The red paint was a level 1 acrylic that I poured into a paper cup and mixed it with warm water.  When I got it to the right consistency, I just poured it right onto the canvas.  When the red had partially dried, I took a turquoise blue and mixed it water, pouring it directly over the red paint.  The result is what you see in this picture of the painting.  It was amazing to watch the transformation take place from a plain white canvas to this expression.

This painting is unlike anything I've ever done.  I have stretched my wings and begun the journey to see what I'm capable of creating, and this is just a scratch on the surface.