We live in a world of social networking, instant communication, and blogging. We throw our lives out there for the world to see, and follow the status updates of friends to make sure that we are kept in-the-loop. I know that I'm guilty of posting status updates to Twitter and Facebook whether I'm in a good mood or a bad mood, oftentimes hoping for encouragement, a quick laugh, or someone to just empathize with me. But as good intentioned as the 1000 people that are my "Friends" are, I never really feel like I can be truly authentic. I continue to try and ride the line so that I press just enough to get a small reaction, but I'm not trying to piss anyone off. But why? Why I am so desperate for comments but not all that willing to be totally honest? Why do I make smart-ass comments and then attach the little smiley to it so as to soften the blow?
I think that we have created a world where we beg for authenticity, but it's completely superficial. We want to seem authentic, but our real motive is to post enough online to keep people semi-informed so that they don't forget that we exist. I mean let's be honest...if you're not on Facebook or Twitter or have some sort of online presence, you don't exist. People want to keep tabs and feel involved and if you're not there, then you become little more than a vapor.
I had a conversation with some friends last night about a church that we had been attending. It was amazing to find that we all had some of the same concerns and frustrations (which was why we had been on a church hiatus), and wanted so much more out of our experience there. But we had all been silent, hiding behind smiles and excuses of being busy. We had the opportunity to be honest, and we had shared only partial truth on occasion, or it was avoided at all costs in order to keep the waters calm. (I try to be more of silent type because of my opinionated personality). But the four of us knew that in order for things to result in change, we needed to have a voice and be honest not only with ourselves, but others. No more emoticons.
Is it possible to be completely authentic online, or even in person for that matter? Or are we doomed to spend the rest of our lives hiding behind the smiley faces? I'm not sure that it's possible to answer. So many of us have been burned by people, businesses, and churches that we don't know who or how to trust. Because of this pseudo-relational world that we've created, we have a hard time living in reality. I do know, however, that I want a real community of people that knows that I am who I am, which means that some days will be amazing, and some will suck. I don't want to be around people that talk behind my back, have alterior motives, or just plain old don't like me for me. In a "how many friends/followers do you have" world, I find myself totally uninterested in "Keeping up with the Kardashians".
So you can be a friend of mine of Facebook, or follow me on Twitter, or even read my blog, but know that I am attaching a disclaimer of sorts to all of those things and it looks something like this:
WARNING:
Opinions expressed here are the opinion of Kate Harris only.
You are not obligated to agree or care either way.
Kate Harris strives for honesty and authenticity on Facebook, Twitter and her Blog.
If you don't like the way she does things, then there are plenty of people who exist in pseudo-reality that you are more than welcome to follow to make yourself feel better.
Kate Harris will challenge herself and you, if you so choose.
Follow her at your own risk.
If this doesn't suit you, then that's okay. I'm just making sure that everyone is aware that my intentions are not piss off, but to strive for something more in this online (and not online) world. And the next time you are having a horrible day, don't attach the smiley emoticon to your status. Just be honest. I'm no guru or psychologist, but I do know that when I'm honest with both myself and others, working through this thing called life gets just a little bit easier and has less surprises.
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