What's amazing to me is that once I get to the gym, I'm actually glad I went. I find extra things to do and classes to take. I push myself once I get there. How is it that I can do that, but barely push myself out of bed? There has got to be some sort of switch that gets flipped on for those people who just pop out of bed and rush to the gym without thinking.
I wonder if I even have that switch...
Who knows. But, I do what I can. I battle a very strong sense of lazy to will myself out the front door. Some days I win. Some days I lose.
I started off this year knowing that I wanted to continue my trek towards better health. I also had numerous people telling me all the things that I needed to do. Some even challenged me when I ate certain things or chose not to work out. This may work for some, but I told people that even though I wanted to get back on track, I had to wait until I was ready. I couldn't start too early or I would feel like I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. I had to want it for myself, not want it to make everyone else shut up. I would end up fizzling out quickly and with self-loathing. I would tell people when they challenged me, "Today isn't the day. I'm not ready. I will begin as soon as it clicks for me and I want it. Before then, I need to be left alone."
Understand that some people may read this and think that I was just being lazy or non-commital. They may say that my method was completely absurd and that I did ti wrong. That's fine. Maybe that's true. But I do know that one day recently, it just clicked. I couldn't get getting back in shape and healthy out of my mind. I became obsessed with it. And I started. I wanted it. I wanted to win.
So here's to another day of making it to the gym and making healthy eating choices. Winning.
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