i am kate

Kate's Chicken Pot Pie

2012-02-02T16:00:00.000-06:00

I made this the other night and was totally in love with it! I have always been a lover of pot pies, (my grandmother made the best homemade ones), but I have abstained from them due to their high fat content and overall bad reputation for not being "healthy". This one is far from diet food, but is healthier than the store-bought version, and way tastier. Tweak as you see fit or follow to the T. You won't be disappointed!

*To save on fat and salt, I buy a whole, antibiotic free chicken from the grocery store and roast it myself. Makes for very fresh chicken that you have control over.
2-3 cups chopped up chicken
2 cups chopped carrots
3 medium yukon potatoes, diced
2 cups canned white corn
1/3 cup unsalted butter
2 shallots, finely chopped
1/3 cup all purpose flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp black pepper
1 3/4 cups low sodium chicken broth
2/3 cups 1% milk
1 can cream of mushroom soup

1 can homestyle biscuits

Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

In saucepan, combine carrots, potatoes, and corn and cover with water. Boil for 15 minutes or until tender. Remove from heat, drain, and set aside.

In saucepan over medium heat, melt butter and add shallots, cooking until translucent. Stir in flour, salt and pepper. Slowly stir in chicken broth and milk. Simmer, while stirring constantly, over medium heat until thick. Remove from heat.

In large bowl, combine veggies, chicken, can of mushroom soup, and sauce. Stir until coated.

In 9x13 baking dish, pour chicken and veggie mixture, spreading until even in dish.

Remove biscuits from can. Cut each biscuit in half to create 2 thin biscuits. Place over the the top of dish.

Bake for 30-35 minutes (don't let biscuits burn) Or until hot and bubbly. Cool for 5 minutes before serving.

Confessions of a Foodie

2012-02-02T15:39:00.000-06:00

I have a sweet tooth. And an intense need for salt. Okay...I pretty much just love all things "food".

I am a foodie.

You know. One of these geeks who loves all things food including, but not limited to, strange food, boutique food, ethnic food, and farm to table food. (Most foodies are not into TGI Fridays, Applebees, and other mediocre chains) I love trying new things, cooking and baking, and eating in boutique restaurants in every city. I'm a sucker for Thai and sushi in particular. So many flavors...

(back to what I was saying...)

Being a foodie makes eating healthy one of the most challenging things in my fight against being overweight. It's the most difficult because I can't say no to so many things...especially if I've never had them before. It's because I simply love food. And I discriminate against none of it.

(Except okra and hot dogs)

One of the reasons that I love to cook/bake so much is because of the ability I have to create in the kitchen. I love giving life to food that brings people joy when they eat it. I live for that moment. Plus, I love new flavors, new ideas, and just plain ole' creativity. But they say that losing weight is only 20% working out. The other 80% is in the food we eat. Half the battle against food is at the grocery store.

Sometimes I win. Sometimes I lose. Sometimes I don't care.

The reality is that I don't have to stop being in love with food to lose weight. I don't have to be afraid of it. I have to respect it. I have to control it. Sounds stupid, maybe, but it works for me. When I don't limit myself (within reason) with food, I don't crave only the things I can't have. I don't keep dairy in the house because my body can't handle it. But if I'm at someone's house and it's in the food, I don't freak out. I love ice cream and frozen yogurt and all things that you would find in a Halloween bucket, but when I don't eliminate them from my life, I don't sit and pine over them...dreaming that I could just have them back...and therefore don't notice them in the checkout line at the store.

Crazy I know.

I don't know what works for you, but realizing this about myself has put me in a very good position of control. I may lose weight at a little slower pace, but losing is losing, and being confident in my own abilities is very rewarding.

Winning.

2012-02-01T12:01:00.000-06:00

I am not the first person to admit that I struggle to get to the gym. My bed is so warm...my body still tired...in other words: I'm lazy. That's really all it boils down to even though we refuse to admit that's what we are actually saying.

What's amazing to me is that once I get to the gym, I'm actually glad I went. I find extra things to do and classes to take. I push myself once I get there. How is it that I can do that, but barely push myself out of bed? There has got to be some sort of switch that gets flipped on for those people who just pop out of bed and rush to the gym without thinking.

I wonder if I even have that switch...

Who knows. But, I do what I can. I battle a very strong sense of lazy to will myself out the front door. Some days I win. Some days I lose.

I started off this year knowing that I wanted to continue my trek towards better health. I also had numerous people telling me all the things that I needed to do. Some even challenged me when I ate certain things or chose not to work out. This may work for some, but I told people that even though I wanted to get back on track, I had to wait until I was ready. I couldn't start too early or I would feel like I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. I had to want it for myself, not want it to make everyone else shut up. I would end up fizzling out quickly and with self-loathing. I would tell people when they challenged me, "Today isn't the day. I'm not ready. I will begin as soon as it clicks for me and I want it. Before then, I need to be left alone."

Understand that some people may read this and think that I was just being lazy or non-commital. They may say that my method was completely absurd and that I did ti wrong. That's fine. Maybe that's true. But I do know that one day recently, it just clicked. I couldn't get getting back in shape and healthy out of my mind. I became obsessed with it. And I started. I wanted it. I wanted to win.

So here's to another day of making it to the gym and making healthy eating choices. Winning.

Finding Motivation

2012-01-31T10:24:00.000-06:00

Since deciding that I wanted to finally "kick the habit" of being just enough overweight to be annoying, I have shed 3 pounds. Ooooo....3. Whole. Pounds. I know it doesn't seem like much, but it's a huge motivation for me to at least be in a downward motion on the scale. One thing that I use to help spur some of that elusive motivation is this little gimmick. The visual representation of weight being lost and gained keeps the OCD me on my toes. I love to put the marbles from one jar to the other like a little kid. And the fact that I keep it in my kitchen (in plain sight btw) is even more motivation than you could imagine. Every time I find myself wandering aimlessly and sort of hungry into the kitchen, it's there to give me the stare-down and remind me why I'm doing what I'm doing. I want to be confident, self-assured, and comfortable in my own skin. I also want to wear a bathing suit both in Vegas and during the summer, be physically prepared to have a child, and when I am confident in myself I love my husband better. (Crazy, I know).

When the idea of losing those pesky pounds seems overwhelming and impossible, finding motivation can be a task of it's own. But it's there. It's that nagging voice when you hit snooze on your 7:00am Saturday morning alarm that says, "I really should go to that spin class and not be lazy." That faint reminder that you shouldn't eat that extra bowl of ice cream. I find mine in both these nifty little jars, and in the face of my husband. I love him deeply and want the best out of life for the both of us. Like I said, when I love myself and am confident in myself, I love him better. I don't hold anything back. That's the life that I want.

I Care Again

2012-01-27T19:36:00.000-06:00

I hav decided to use this blog once again. I know that I'm a few-and-far-betweener type of blogger, but I think using this just for me may be better suited for my brain. I journal on paper...why not here.

This past summer I managed to kick-start an amazing trek down the path of getting in shape by losing 33 pounds in a matter of weeks. I accomplished this by 5-6 days of 1-2 hours in the gym spinning, running, lifting, and yoga. I was intense about my eating and focused hard-core on reaching my goals. But I did what I always do...fizzled out after reaching 33 pounds lost. I felt accomplished, proud, and invincible. I figured if I had lost all that weight, then I deserved a little bit of leeway to enjoy the things I hadn't been enjoying. Things like chinese, pizza, and all things ice cream. I fell back on the exercises as well when a spin class was cancelled right after my yoga class at the end of August. I told myself that I would find a different class and would do that one instead. But the class schedules were rearranged for the upcoming school year, and the hard-core classes were either earlier or late at night after people were off work. So I got lazy. I stuck to the yoga and pilates classes, but eventually fizzled out of those as well when I wasn't in town Fridays-Sundays because of shows that we picked up on the weekends.

However, yesterday I took the plunge and dyed my hair a dramatic red. This was the nudge over the edge to put my mind in the right place. Also, I have a trip to Vegas planned for my anniversary this year (which includes some great friends) and I want to lay by the pool with everyone else this time without having an anxiety attack. I want to actually buy a bathing suit with confidence...not just get the one with the most coverage. I will also be turning 29 this year and they say that once women hit 30, it gets harder and harder to lose weight and stay in shape. The overachiever in me wants to put myself ahead of the curve and not have to spend my 30s trying to shed the weight of my 20s. That's all.

It's easy to say all these things, but I'm serious. I hate looking in the mirror and trying on outfit after outfit. I hate not being confident in myself. I hate being fearful. And most of all...I'm tired of being lazy. At some point enough has to be enough and I have to stop looking at everyone else and simply wishing. I have to love myself enough to buck up and do it.

So let's do it. 96 days until my 29th birthday and 103 until I leave for Vegas. Here's to kicking ass!

A Changing Of Tides

2011-05-10T11:09:00.000-05:00

I feel as though the last few weeks have forced major life reflection on me. I find myself wondering, wandering, and dreaming more. Blame it on a trip to New York, a trip to DC, an exceptional time living life with my husband, or the snap-decision move back to our home in Franklin. It could have been any or all, but I find myself ready for what's next.

I am a restless spirit. I know there's so much to this life and I never want to waste time or miss out on opportunities. I want to consume all the life has to offer. I am a creative; an artist; a dreamer. Though this restlessness drives my desire for a full life, it also leaves me frustrated that I might be missing out or not fulfilling my destiny. I waiver between contentedness and anxiousness often. And anxious is where I find myself today.

I feel a change in the tides coming my way, and because I'm no psychic, I am irritated that I can't see exactly what's waiting in the shift. Or did the shift already happen and I just missed it?

I have a hard time believing that being back in a town that I don't really want to be in around people I can't seem to mesh with is where my future has taken me. I would rather be running full-speed towards dreams of New York and spending a vast majority of time gazing at the walls of MoMA only to be inspired beyond my wildest dreams. I dream of progression...creativity...opportunities...

((sigh))

Who knows what's next. There's no life map to my chagrin, but would I really be happier with my life laid out before me? Maybe I would be disappointed.

In all of this reflection, I know this to be true: I will seek to be the best I can wherever I am. I will always have dreams of where I'll live, what kind of career will take off, and where that life will lead. But I can relax a little knowing that the pursuit of all these things will never cease and my life will be exactly the way it was designed.

Enough is Enough

2011-03-13T19:45:00.001-05:00

We recently performed a show for an audience that could have cared less that we were there. Granted it was for a Christian sports league end-of-the-year event, they were beyond the normal excited and rowdy. Both kids and adults alike spent the show talking to each other, running around, texting on their phones, and actually yelling things at us while we performed. What’s unfortunate for this audience was that we had been with them several years earlier and remembered it being the same way. People were distracted and rude throughout the whole hour, making us just want to throw in the towel and walk off the stage in defeat. However, we aren’t those kind of performers, and we finished our hour off with tons of energy and positivity. We weren’t going to let one show get us down.

Once I entered the lobby to head to our merchandise table, it only got worse. The comments from parents both directly and indirectly went like this:

“Oh you guys were great...the kids just loved you”

“You should come in for our pre-school”

“No Audrey...you don’t need anymore junk to play with”

“I am not buying you cheap crap”

“So, how many people have you suckered into buying some of this junk?”

I’m not exaggerating. We get this stuff all the time. Parents opening their mouths, oftentimes out of ignorance and with good intentions, taking all of the wind out of our sails. It makes us feel insignificant and like we’re trying to steal from them.

Let me make something very clear: When you, as parents, talk on your phone, text, and generally have complete lack of care during an event, your kids will follow suit. You show them that when they are in a church setting, hearing about Jesus, that it is no more important than your Twitter and Facebook account. You are an example and your kids will follow your lead.

When you come up to us after a show and call our resources “cheap crap” and wonder how many people have been “suckered into buying some of this junk”, to be completely blunt, you’re being a jerk. Think about the words that you’re saying and if you would want someone to say that about anything that you have or sell. You’re not being funny and it’s a huge slap in the face to us who are trying to serve you and your family by making things available that are both inexpensive and clean. If you don’t want to buy anything, be an adult and say “no” to your child. We don’t mind if you aren’t interested. Just keep your comments to yourself.

I am fully aware that there will be people who will read this and think they are different. That their church is different. Trust me...it’s pretty much the same experience all the way across the board. Churches, in my opinion, are some of the most disrespectful and frustrating places to perform, and they are called to be more. Maybe you’ll just be mad at me. Go ahead and be mad. I’m being honest and letting you know that it’s rare to be treated well in church settings. And I’m tired of being the dumping ground for ignorance.

It’s time to grow up people. It’s time to be the church instead of no different from the world around you.

Delta Strikes Again.

2011-01-28T09:56:00.004-06:00

The other day, my husband and I flew from Nashville to Los Angeles for a show at Pepperdine University. We flew Delta Airlines, as usual, since we have gold status with them and we love the perks. I mean, what’s not to love about 3 free bags a piece without having to pay overweight fees, free upgrades, priority boarding, and getting through security faster? I can’t think of anything not to love...until Delta stole my new coat.

Here’s the story: We boarded our flight to LAX in Atlanta (after being re-routed because of a delayed flight from Memphis) and took our middle seats. I took my coat and placed in the overhead bin above my seat and took my bag and tucked it under the seat in front of me. I was in the middle seat and didn’t want to have to get up 10 times to get stuff in and out of it. Fortunately, our flight wasn’t full and there were a bunch of seats available together (we are never seated together for some reason) so we re-located about 10 seats back at the back of the plane. There we stayed for the next 4.5 hours.

Upon our arrival into LAX around 6pm, we gathered our stuff and were the last people off the plane. We walked down to baggage claim where we were concerned that our bags wouldn’t be because of our last minute flight re-route, and began the 30 minute wait until they finally popped down the conveyer belt. It wasn’t until I got in the rental car shuttle that I realized I didn’t have my coat.

45 minutes had passed since I had gotten off the plane.

I told the shuttle driver to let me off and proceeded to run back up the stairs to the ticketing counter and from terminal 3 to 5 at LAX. Anyone who’s ever been to LAX knows that terminal 3 isn’t all that close to terminal 5. After getting up to the ticketing counter, I was told that I had to go back downstairs to the lost luggage counter because when things are left on the plane, they are immediately taken down to that counter. That’s “Delta procedure”.

So I ran down to the lost luggage counter where I was told that 55 minutes had passed since I had gotten off the plane and they would call up to the gate to see where my jacket was. After a brief conversation, I was told that a few things had been taken from the plane, but that the plane had been moved to the hangar and she didn’t know what had happened to those items.

For real?

I was then assured that it should turn up since there were things taken from the plane and that I could come and pick it up when I flew out a few days later. They had my information and I left the airport. This was mistake #2. (Mistake #1 was leaving the coat on the plane in the first place).

The day before we were to fly out, we drove back from San Diego and went to see if it was there. I was told by the lost luggage lady that unless I received a phone call, then my coat hadn’t turned up. She was confused why I would even think it would be there and that things left on the plane rarely show up there. But when I asked if it was “Delta procedure” to take forgotten items from the gate to that counter, she replied, “Yes it is.”. Hmmm...

I was then told that there was nothing she could do and that I needed to call Delta or get on Delta.com to file a complaint. So I called Delta. The first woman I talked to at Priority Services said that there wasn’t anything that she could do since she wasn’t the complaints department. She was friendly and gave me the numbers that I needed to call and then said that she hoped I could find my coat, but that it’s “unlikely since so many things get stolen when they are left on the plane. No joke.

So I call Delta helpline #2, and after going through the automated prompts, the machine says that things left on a plane are out of their control. Click. Hung up on me.

After having lit up Twitter with my complaint, I get a reply from @deltaassist telling me that they are sorry that this happened to me and here’s the link to file a formal complaint. Thanks for the “assistance” anonymous twitter gopher.

Helpline #3 is me begging the automated machine to let me speak to a representative. The woman I get tells me the same thing. There is a procedure that’s supposed to be followed, but it’s not their problem. I was told that I could file a formal complaint and then the “higher-ups” at corporate would take care of it. Upon hearing this, I told the girl that I would bet Delta gets thousands of these “formal complaints” a day about similar things and that my assumption was that this was nothing more than a formality to get me to shut up. I told her that if the procedure is to take things left on the plane to the lost baggage claim and they fail to do that, then the only thing I can conclude is that I have a cute coat and someone decided to steal it, and now I was getting the run around to make me shut up.

After putting me on hold, she asked me what my jacket cost. I told her it was $100. She informed me that I would receive a check from them in 25 business days for $100 and I could buy a new one. Aw thanks.

I will gladly take my $100, but I can’t get that coat again. And the fact of a lost/stolen coat is not what I take issue with. I take issue with a lack of care and laziness to do ones job. If you have a procedure, there’s no reason that you should have a problem following it. Delta is a huge company that I devote thousands and thousands of airline miles to, but if I can’t trust that my things are safe when I make a mistake, why stick with them? I am frustrated that big companies give you the run around and try to pacify the angry public with ineffective “solution” tactics. If the job was done right the first time, fewer people would be upset...but that’s just not the case. It’s like big companies are gluttons for punishment.

I wish that Delta would have been helpful and that it didn’t take 4 phone calls to different people and 2 trips to the lost baggage to have someone do something about it. I wish that my coat hadn’t been stolen. And I wish that integrity and customer service weren’t things that have been lost over the decades.

Bad form Delta.

I Am An Addict.

2011-01-25T01:22:00.000-06:00

I am one of those people that every November (I’m an overachiever) writes out a long list of “New Years Resolutions” with the intention of becoming a better person. Yet, just like the rest of the world, when I realize on January 2nd that my intentions are destined to be a disaster, I find myself already on the path to giving up without any reason for a fight.

I am a typical resolutioner in the sense that my resolutions tend to revolve around losing weight, working out more, reading my Bible, and following through on more projects. So far, I have managed to gain 3 pounds, not step foot in the gym once, fell asleep reading through a Bible passage, and have 4 projects started and you guessed it...nothing finished. Talk about failure. Now I have the rest of the year to wallow in my early failures and hope for better luck next time.

Let’s get this straight: I want to follow through. I want to have the discipline to do what I need to do to accomplish goals. The problem is that I’m lazy. Things are too hard. I like to call it the “American Way”: want it all hoping that someone else will do it for me. But like they tell you in AA, the first step in recovery is recognizing that you’re an addict.

I am an addict.

I am an addict of desire without follow-through. An addict of creativity without execution. An addict of wondering why everyone else “gets” and I “get not.”

Now that I realize these things, I am lucky to understand that there is a solution to this problem and it starts with me. It takes some hoodspuh to initiate change in myself and my mindset. I have to forget the “diet starts Monday” mentality and just do. Seems like such a simple solution: just do. But that’s what makes it so difficult. We complicate, over-analyze, and whine making it harder and harder. We set ourselves up to fail before we’ve ever started.

Even though I’ve already managed to “fail” by societies’ standards, I have decided to try again. I can’t succeed if I only allow one failure a year. So in my attempt to reclaim my New Years’ Resolutions, I have listing them here publicly. I am giving it another go. And I may fail again. But if and when that happens, I will not give up. I will regroup and start over as many times as it takes.

Here it goes:

Run 2-3 times a week no less than 2 miles with a goal of the CMA 1/2 marathon in April.
lose the last 30 pounds before the summer. (I managed 30 pounds down from April-December last year)
Blog more often.
Take a vacation that doesn’t include Twitter.
Hold an art show in the fall.
Get website/new branding up and running
Paint one new painting every month (starting in Feb since I’m not home the rest of Jan)

There it is. A small but conquerable list. And the journey begins.

Looking Forward

2010-12-31T21:19:00.002-06:00

2010 comes to an end in just a few short hours. Another year to pack away in the books. Some had the year of their lives while some struggled to just get by. Either way, I know that everyone loves to look forward to a new year. It will bring new opportunities, new ideas, and new experiences to everyone.

I look forward to the new year every year. Sometimes it’s because I had a really crappy year that did little more than bring heartache, disappointment, and frustration, and sometimes it’s because I had such a great year and can’t possibly imagine what could make another year better.

This year has been one of heartache, disappointment, and frustration for me. Everything from cancelled shows and trips last second, piling debts that were intended to be paid off, frustration with work and people, and to top the year off, an unexpected death in the family. I have wept, wondered, questioned, and screamed on more than one occasion in 2010. But I have also been hopeful. Hopeful that things would change...get better. I know that 2011 isn’t some sort of “reset” button that automatically makes things better, but at least we have a starting place.

I have high-hopes for 2011. I have high-hopes every year, but this year is especially high. I want certain things so much that I didn’t even bother waiting until the “official new year” for them to start. I got a jump start on continuing my weight loss (30 pounds down with 30 to go), and a major jump start on creating some new products for Kate Harris Art in 2011.

So here’s to looking forward to new chances, new opportunities, new jobs, new bodies, and anything else you could possibly have! 2010 is in the books!

Today.

2010-12-14T23:07:00.000-06:00

Today I am cynical and restless.

Today I want to curl up in a ball and weep my way through a bowl of ice cream.

Today I wonder, "How did I get here...and when will it too, pass?"

Today I feel unattractive and inadequate.

Today I am honest. Today I feel deeply. Today I am lonely.

I pray that tomorrow brings peace, hope, and desire.

I pray that today is just that: only today.

The Monotony of the Christmas Season

2010-12-05T16:18:00.000-06:00

I feel like there's tons of people that start off Christmas blogs, letters, and twitter posts with the phrase..."that time of year again." As witty as some people think that their being, this simple phrase echos emptiness, discontent, and boredom. When did Christmas get monotonous for us?

I will be the first to admit that when it comes to holidays, I am not the most enthusiastic. My favorites include the likes of Halloween, Thanksgiving, and New Years, but it hasn't always been Christmas. If I were to be completely honest, I would say for years I found Christmas somewhat stressful and annoying. There was the need to keep up in the decoration department by having our house look like it threw up Christmas cheer, buy gifts that we didn't have the money for for people that we didn't think deserved them, there were too many parties to go to, and Christmas music was a never-ending redundancy of 65 versions of "Jingle Bells" and "Oh, Holy Night". For years, I couldn't wait until Christmas was just over and done with. It was just same ole, same ole.

For the first time, I understand that Christmas is so much more than we make it out to be. We, as a culture, have taken a great celebration and made it monotonous. We are creatures of habit and masters of tradition, never really taking the time to think and wonder. We have stripped the true joy of the season and replaced it with cheap imitation in the likes of Apple computers, PS2s, and diamond earrings. And yet all we are really doing is going through the motions.

It's not the Griswald Family Christmas that we all feel is inevitable because of our wacky families. I mean, seriously, who doesn't have at least 1 Cousin Eddie in the family? It's about thoughtfulness, quality time with friends and family, eating (we were all thinking it), and realizing that not only is it just the day that we celebrate the birth of our God; it's the day that we celebrate the changing of the world and of our futures. It's about hope. Until I could realize that Christmas is about hope, how could it not be monotonous, boring, and stressful? Those feelings are conjured up because I had the wrong perspective because of things that don't matter.

I was listening to a podcast earlier this week, and one of the people on it commented on the difference between presents and gifts. A present is something that is given with the understanding that something is to be given in return. A gift is given with no strings attached. When I heard that, I couldn't believe that it could be so simple. I have given very few gifts, and a boatload of presents over the years. And yet God had sent His only son. The single most selfless gift that could have ever been given, and I had forgotten. How could I have been so daft?

All this being said, I have decided to reclaim Christmas for myself and my family. I don't want to just go through the motions of buying meaningless things and giving them away half-heartedly. I want to create, listen to the Rat Pack, and not worry about getting in return. I want to relish in the changing of the course of history for us. I want to remember the hope that was given with no strings attached. And I want to celebrate without restriction!

Merry Christmas.

Blessed Be Egypt, My People

2010-11-19T10:24:00.001-06:00

After my post from yesterday, I am happy to announce that I went to bed at 8 Egypt time, and slept for an uninterrupted 13 hours straight. I woke up feeling like a new person! And it's a good thing that I had the extended slumber, because we ended up with not 2 but 3 shows.

(remember from my last post that you have to BE FLEXIBLE and pretty much anything goes when you're overseas)

Our current venue is this tent in the picture below. Now, this picture is taken from our balcony and may seem small, but holds just over 750 people.

We have done our last 4 performances in this tent with people pouring out the back, and angry that they aren't able to get inside. The side flaps had to be raised so that people could see, making our performance available to over 1500 people. This has posed a small problem for the promotors of this event because there are still too many people trying to get in.

In an attempt to make our show available to everyone that wanted to see it, we were moved to the stadium that is designed to hold all 12,000 people in attendance for this festival. We filled the stadium to almost 7500.

Now, this is not an ego-boosting blog post. It's just amazing to see the response from the Egyptian people to what we're doing. They flock inside to see the floating table, straight-jacket escape, and hear my husband speak to them. They are completely engaged. I wish that these couple of pictures did the energy and passion of the Egyptian people could come through.

There are wooden carvings all over this complex that say, "Blessed be Egypt, my people" (Isaiah 19:25) The Egyptian Christians that live and work here believe that God has given them a special place in history. They struggle here in country that believes it should be entirely Muslim. But they are both hopeful and faithful to their belief. To be here at this time to serve, encourage and challenge them is humbling, and I love every second of it.

Egypt: The First 72 Hours

2010-11-18T10:38:00.000-06:00

If I were to tell the story of our Egypt adventure over the last 75 hours, you may think that I’m kidding. It has been as amazing as it has been exhausting and full of surprises.

We left the States on Monday afternoon, making our way through Atlanta, New York, and then on to Cairo. That leg of our trip alone was over 20 hours of travel. 11 of it on our midnight flight from JFK to Cairo. But as we hit the ground in Cairo, despite our obvious lack of sleep (because who can really sleep on a an airplane), we were energized with excitement of a new place and new people. Our excitement was short-lived when we met our host and he told us that we would be leaving, previously unknown to us, in 4 hours from the Cairo airport to head on a one hour plane ride to Luxor, lower Egypt for a show. So we stayed at the airport with our host and our Norwegian strong-men (for real…they are part of Team Extreme) until our 11:45 flight out of Cairo.

Time awake by the time of our landing in Luxor: 34 Hours (Side note: We have not slept since Sunday night, when it was in our own beds.)

After arriving at our hotel in Luxor at 2:30 in the morning, we found out that we would be heading out for our 4 hour van ride at precisely 4:30 am. However, anyone who has ever traveled internationally knows that exact times are never exact, but more of a suggestion. So after napping for about 2 hours, we sat in the van for another before we ever even left the city.

The city that we ended up in, Sojh, 7 hours south of Cairo. What started as one show turned into 2. The audiences were amazing and the house was completely packed for both! All in all, around 3500 people saw our last-minute show. Unfortunately we didn’t get a chance to stay after the last show because we were scheduled to fly back to Cairo, out of Luxor, that night at midnight. We piled back into the van, my husband and I and the 2 Norwegians, plus 1 Egyptian strong-man. We drove the 4 hours back to Luxor, where we were promptly dropped off at the airport for our midnight flight.

As I sat down in the food court with my pack of strawberry cookies and chili lime chips, (the other option was what looked like 3-day-old pizza), I took a deep breath, knowing that even though I was exhausted and a little loopy from lack of sleep, that it was not about us and our comfort. We had come to Egypt to serve. Plain and simple. And even though it had been frustrating and kind of made me want to weep uncontrollably, we were here for a purpose.

Time Awake as we fly back to Cairo: 55 Hours

Again, as you read this, you may be thinking that I’m exaggerating. Not even a little bit. But crazy at it sounds, it’s not over yet.

After our 1 hour flight from Luxor to Cairo, we were picked up at the airport by our van, and piled in for our 1.5 hour drive to Wadi, where we would be putting down roots for a few days for the festival. On top of my husband and I and the 2 Norwegians, we picked up a Brazilian jujitsu artist fresh off his flight from Sao Paulo. We chatted and laughed about all of the things that had just happened in a short 48 hours, and talked about how nice it would be to have a good nights’ sleep in a real bed for the first time in days. But the chatter died down after about 2 hours (remember the 1.5 hour drive?) and we realized that the driver didn’t know where he was. He began to loop around the highway, stop in gas stations, and stop at local street marketers close to the highway, asking for directions.

Now take a step back. We are in a van, in the middle of the desert, with 2 Americans, 1 Brazilian, and 2 Norwegians, all of which speak no Arabic. Our driver speaks no English. We ask over and over where we are and why we aren’t at the hotel, and it flusters him to the point of extending our 1.5 hour trip to over 4 hours. (You’d be flustered too if you had an angry Norwegian strong-man sitting behind you asking where the hotel was). We eventually pull down a small road that eventually stops being pavement and is loose desert sand. No lights, no road signs, and no camp in sight. After having listened to terror stories about kidnappings and small side roads that lead to nowhere from our previous days’ driver, we all start to wonder if we would ever make it out of Egypt alive. But luckily for us, (and our driver), we pulled into the Biet El Wadi complex around 4 am.

Time Awake when we reach our fresh hotel beds: 63 Hours.

Let me wrap this up by saying this: if you have every visited another country, you know that time is almost in a state of suspension. There is no hurry, no on-time (except when flying), and no real worry. Leisure reigns. And when we are overseas, we have learned that our American pace gets set aside and we become flexible. That is the travelers code: Be Flexible. If you fail at being flexible, you would hate overseas work. It’s hard and rewarding and amazing all at the same time.

As with every other time that I am overseas, I am in love with the cultural experience, the people, the food, and the way that God works. I am looking forward to seeing what the next few days holds, and hopefully I can get my camera to work again by the time we get to the Pyramids.

Now for some much needed sleep…

For the Foodies

2010-09-05T16:57:00.000-05:00

Anyone who knows me even a little bit knows that:

I love to cook.

I love to try new things and push myself both creatively and domestically in the kitchen. As the temperatures begin to dip below summer levels and into the fall, I get excited to know that we are entering into one of the best food times of the year: Fall. Soups, warm breads, casseroles, and pies are what I think of when we get to fall. All things that make us a little warmer inside.

In lieu of this temperature transition, I've decided to let you in on one of my favorite recipes for a cool night. Vegetarian chili. Hope that you enjoy and I would love to hear what you think of it!!

Kate's Vegetarian Chili
1 large yellow onion, chopped
1 red pepper, chopped
1 green pepper, chopped
1 yellow pepper, chopped
4 cloves garlic, chopped
3 medium tomatoes, diced
1 jalepeno, no seeds, minced
1 small can tomato paste
2 15oz cans no salt added black beans, drained and rinsed
1 15oz can no salt added red kidney beans, drained and rinsed
1 15oz can no salt added cannellini beans, drained and rinsed
6 cups low salt chicken stock
1 Tbsp olive oil
1 Tbsp chili powder
2 Tbsp salt
1 Tbsp black pepper

Place tomatoes, chicken stock, olive oil, tomato paste, all beans, jalepeno, and salt and pepper in slow cooker set to med-high heat (or 8 hours on some models).

Chop peppers and onion and put in large skillet on med-low heat. Saute until soft. Add chopped garlic and saute for 2 min. Add all peppers, onion, and garlic to slow cooker.

Stir and let cook for up to 8 hours, tasting regularly and adding salt, pepper, or spice to taste. Serve hot over cornbread.

Serves 6-8 people

** for less spicier chili, do not put in jalepeno, or replace with jarred jalepenos which are less spicy
** for a meaty chili, add lean Jenny-O ground turkey or ground chorizo sausage. Both are amazing and both have completely different flavors.

A God Conversation

2010-08-25T10:13:00.001-05:00

I am here. I know that I haven't been lately, and I hate that I feel as though I've let you down.

"Then sings my soul..."

I realize that I've neglected our relationship because it hasn't fit into my schedule. I have your book laying next to my bed, loaded on my computer, and available on my phone. Yet I still don't read it.

"Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path..."

You know my heart and where it's at today. You know my struggles, my anxieties, and my bitterness. I wonder sometimes, foolishly I know, why You would leave me to struggle through these things seemingly alone. I fail so often, I'm not quite sure why you would think that I'm capable.

"I will fear no evil, for thou art with me..."

I sigh because I hate that we aren't as close as we used to be. That's not your fault, it's mine. I don't talk to you unless I need you...I don't listen unless I'm waiting to hear...and I feel empty because I don't let you love me like I know that you do. It's like I want to live in misery.

"Be still and know that I AM GOD..."

I need you. These aren't just empty words. They come from somewhere deeper. It's a longing that I can't really explain. I need clarity and energy.

"Cast all your cares on Me, for I care for you..."

Thank you for all that you have given me. I deserve so much less. I know, somewhere maybe a little deeper than it should be, that you have this whole thing called "my life" worked out. You have a plan. And you would never give me more than I can handle. I know that you already are, but be patient with me while I'm on this journey.

"I know the plans I have for you...plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future..."

I love you.

Taking Time To Smell The Coffee

2010-08-13T13:18:00.000-05:00

There are few things that I love more than quiet mornings with a book , blanket, and a cup of coffee. Even better if it's raining. Because of my crazy life, I find these times alone few and far between. And necessary.

The stillness of the morning makes the loudness in my head that is business, projects, frustrations, and conversations, amplify. I am forced to finally sit down and hear their painful cries for attention.

My life is full of noise. There are people and projects that are constantly clambering for my undivided attention. Deadlines are knocking and everyone needs something. Even when I'm on the road with my husband, there is always something that's needing to be done. It's not uncommon to find myself completely overwhelmed to the point of a meltdown because I just can't handle it anymore. The noise is deafening.

When I get to that point-of-no-return, I often wonder how I allowed myself to get there. Again. But, I realize that it's because I didn't take the time to be reflective and clear my head. You know...sit down alone and write, think, pray, or talk to a friend. We get so caught-up in "doing" that we forget what it's like to just be. It's almost as if we are afraid of what we might think about from a painful past, or what we'll feel if we sit still longer than a few seconds. We pull out our computers and phones, wondering what we're missing out on. We remain distracted from reality, creating a disconnect in our hearts and minds. We become numb and start to coast through life.

Distractions are too easy. And they leave us lonely and frustrated in the end.

What distractions do you have?

What are you missing out on because you're too busy?

We need to silence the noise and instead take the time to smell the proverbial coffee.

The Sex Blog :: Swinging

2010-08-05T09:06:00.000-05:00

Sex. Marriage. Mistresses. Monogamy. Sex games. Swinging.

If I haven't succeeded in capturing your attention with one of these words, then you may not have a pulse. Sex is everywhere. It's in our pop music (Britney Spears' song "3" or Katy Perrys' "I Kissed a Girl"), our advertisements, our news articles, and our classrooms. It's either all you can talk about, or the one thing that makes you get all clammy and nervous.

In case you've been living under a rock somewhere, there's a new generation of sex that's on the rise: Swinging. If you don't know what that means, it's simply that couples that are married "swap" to have sex with other people in an attempt to "spice up" their love lives. The craziest part is that swinging has been around since the 60s, when the idea of "free love" hit the culture. Today, it is a multi-million dollar industry whose popularity is on the rise from major cities to the suburbs.

Why, might you ask?

Most people have a bad taste in their mouth when they hear that ugly relationship word: cheaters. They have happened to all of us, or we have been one ourselves. The results are devastating. We lose trust not only of our partner, but of anyone we have a future relationship with. We doubt ourselves and our abilities as a mate. And more often then not, our relationship with that cheater doesn't survive the fallout.

Insert swinging.

I have read multiple articles in the last few weeks about swinging. One article came up while I was at the gym. I was reading Self magazine, and they had a 6 page spread all about the health benefits of swinging, and how it was the new thing for everyone...even the soccer mom. It went on to talk about that when you swing, you and your spouse have a better relationship because you are communicating with each other and increasing your trust bond. (I may or may not have thrown the magazine across the gym)

Even more recently, CNN.com had an article written about a mistress...mistress...from Australia who had been paid to be what she called a "full-time mistress" for about $1000 a week. She would be your "play wife" in the idea that she would cook, clean, have conversations, and perform sex for anyone that wanted what their wives at home apparently couldn't provide. Last I checked, this was a glorified prostitute. She did this for about a year and then wrote a book on her encounters and what she apparently "learned" about men and women. Her conclusion was that married women will never be able to satisfy their husbands, so to give them permission to have sex with other women would keep their marriages together and healthy. Any person in their right mind would not only be deeply offended by this, but find it completely absurd that a prostitute was offering relational advice.

I cannot even describe to you the feelings that I felt as I read these articles. I was deeply offended that prostitutes were giving advice to wives to let their husbands sleep around because they were not enough. And I was offended on behalf of all the men out there who are thought of as nothing more than sex addicts who can't ever seem to get enough. I couldn't believe that people actually thought that having sex with other people, per their spouses' consent, was even remotely healthy. To top it off, many of these people have children. Do they not understand that a non-monogamous relationship is never healthy? That this kind of life is never fulfilling because it's not the way that we are wired? The emotional ramifications of this kind of lifestyle are devastating. Jealousy, boredom, and dissatisfaction can creep in and destroy. This is the new generation of what will eventually be considered normal. And quite honestly, it scares me.

As Christians, we have been afraid of the topic of sex for so long that things like swinging and other forms of promiscuity have crept in. Some of you might even be upset that I would be so bold as to discuss this topic publicly. But the truth is that it's out there and can destroy us quickly and quietly. We need to have discussions about sex with our kids before their view of it is shaped by the likes of Lady Gaga. If you're married, talk with your spouse about what the bedroom should be for you as a couple. Take time and effort to make it healthy. (other people and things are not healthy.) Don't let your marriage fall apart because the spark has died out in the bedroom. And don't let the new generation of sex intimidate and pressure you. You are enough, and you are enough just the two of you.

The Detox Hoax

2010-08-02T23:41:00.003-05:00

It's one of the biggest buzzwords of the last 18 months: Detox.

Thousands of programs and regiments that are designed to "rid your body of toxins". And you know what? It's one of the biggest hoaxes that has hit the public since the Atkins Diet craze. But, as my husband often says, "It's easy to be deceived."

The word "detox", according to Webster's Dictionary, means the following:

"To undergo treatment to rid the body of poisonous substances, especially alcohol and drugs."

It's origin is 1972. Most people who detox are people in rehab (we've all seen Intervention) who are coming down off years of abuse of drugs and alcohol. They are ridding their body of a literal "poison". But somewhere along the way, someone realized that the word "detox" could be used for an entirely different purpose: marketing.

If you were to get on Google (or Bing or Yahoo or whatever engine you use), and type in the word “detox”, you would find over 12.5 million pages of cleanses, diets, plans, blogs, and other various opinions on the subject. You would find things like the Acai Cleanse, the Master Cleanse (or lemon cleanse), Evercleanse, the Cabbage Soup Diet, the ColoThin, and Colonics. Each one claims to detoxify your body in the most effective, and fast, way.

I’m pretty sure that even though you may not have participated in one of these programs, you know someone who has, or you’ve heard of them. But the thing that so many people have failed to realize is that they are just a fad. Go ahead and hate me for saying it, but they are no better or different then weight loss programs like the Atkins diet, the South Beach diet, or my personal favorite, the What Would Jesus Eat? Diet.

We have bought into the fad hook, line, and sinker all over again. Especially us women. We want to be thin…and would do just about anything to get to that point quickly. Everything except give up our Starbucks Frappuccinos with extra whip and the Wendy’s at 11pm. We want a quick-fix to our poor eating habits and have believed that the only way to a healthy life is through not eating for 10 days and drinking a concoction of maple syrup, cayenne pepper, and lemon juice. (Seriously yuck!)

When I searched for a scientific perspective on these cleanses, I consulted a doctor, Wikipedia, and WebMD among others. The opinion was repeated across the board:

“…Symptoms may improve with a detox diet, but there is no evidence that this [detox diets/cleanses] is due to clearing toxins from the body...As it turns out, a balanced, proper diet is more helpful than a detox diet.” WebMD also stated that, “Perhaps one of the biggest dangers of detox diets is the fear they instill in the public…The good news is that your body has its own natural detoxifying process that works quite well. The liver and kidneys do a good job of processing chemicals and eliminating them…” WebMD goes on to make the statement that, “fasting can be addictive because it causes a kind of ‘high’.

(I am putting this statement in there based on the fact that the Master Cleanse is one of the most popular cleanses out there, and it requires a 10-day fast.) There was also a statement in Self magazine that said that women who don’t eat (fast) during a cleanse or diet are, on average, 8 pounds heavier than women who just ate right and exercised! Is anybody getting this?

Are we out of our minds!?

In all honesty, I am just wondering when we stopped paying attention. We believe just about anything, more specifically when it comes to shedding those pounds and that other buzzword: wellness. If we really look deeper into it, we aren’t really interested in a lifestyle change, or being healthy for that matter. Instead, we want to do what we want, when we want, but don’t want the consequences that come along with it. I have read status update after status update on Facebook and Twitter from friends of mine that have decided to "get clean" by choosing one of these diets. The irony, however, is that when all is said and done, they "celebrate" their success and their new-found energy by hitting up their favorite drink at Starbucks and noshing on a cupcake or ice cream. And even more commonly, they just go back to their old food and drink routine, thinking about the next time that they'll "clean out". I'm not kidding! Just think about how ridiculous that is! You've "rid" the toxins from your body only to put them right back in.

The dangers of detox diets and cleanses is right in front of our faces, yet we remain blind. Especially us as women. There's a lie that's easy to miss, but it’s there nevertheless. It’s that nasty lie that tells us over and over that we aren’t good enough, and God and his design are not enough. We take products like these because we find ourselves 25 pounds overweight, lazy, and sometimes even subconsciously blame God for making us with a faulty system. No…we are faulty because we live in a broken world. We don’t want to work hard, eat right, or exercise. We find ourselves caught up in fad diets and quick-fixes because we need to experience that we are enough. We want to feel like we are doing something…anything. But we are left unhappy and empty, cheeseburger still in hand.

DO NOT BUY THE LIE. It's that simple. (For real...it really is). Understand that we all are left with a choice to be healthy or just pretend to be healthy. I would challenge any person, fad-cleanser or non-fad-cleanser, to make a lifestyle change for the better. Just eat healthy. And then, go get some excercise...

This Too Shall Pass.

2010-07-29T12:04:00.001-05:00

Ray Lamontagne said it best when he said, "Will I always feel this way...so empty, so estranged..."

This empty is the kind of feeling that seems to come with a bottomless pit of despair at no extra charge. It's mind-numbing and can send you into a funk that leaves you completely disillusioned. It causes anxiety that whispers to you that nothing will ever be okay. Sound familiar?

I have felt this. I have felt this on more than one occasion. I would find myself unable to believe that good things would ever be possible. And I really couldn't tell you how I ever got to that point. The feeling seemed to sneak up on me and poke me in the eyes. I had zero clarity on anything. But what's even crazier is that I was completely aware that I was in a funk and needed to get out. It's kind of like being awake, but dreaming at the same time. The panic I had for everyday life is almost impossible to describe. Then one day I just woke up. It's like my body and brain decided enough was enough.

I'm sure that on some level, we've all found ourselves here. We wonder "why me?" Sometimes we might even pray to God (or anything that's out there) to get us out of such misery. It consumes us, all the while life is passing us by as if nothing has happened. We feel forgotten. But what is this feeling that we have? Where does it come from? And how do we progress out of it? I know that for me, I found myself in this place when things were not going well. I felt it while I sat at home waiting for my phone to ring or when the bank account had run to almost empty. I would feel as if the whole world had suddenly, and for no reason, turned its' back on me. Realistic? Not really. But that's how I felt.

See the pattern? All of these feelings. I had to come to the realization that my feelings are not always based in reality. I think that there are many times that we forget that life happens. People happen. And though we may have played a role in a relational or business failure, life still goes on. We have to find the ability to drag ourselves out of the gutter and start moving forward. This may seem very simple to understand, but while you're in the midst of it, you find it almost impossible to implement. But again, Ray Lamontagne described getting out of this funk best when he said, "Well I've looked my demons in the eyes, laid bare my chest and said 'do your best to destroy me'. I've been to hell and back and I must admit you kind of bore me." We are given a choice. We can choose to wallow in our hurt, disillusionment, and anger, or we can get up and decide that enough is enough.

I know that we will all hurt and be hurt, but make the choice to drag yourself out of the gutter of self-pity. It will be a process that may be both painful and eye-opening. Yet, at the end of it all, you will remember that this too shall pass. And when it passes, you will be a better person.

Step Away From the Email....

2010-07-23T11:27:00.000-05:00

Do you ever wake up in the morning, and the first thing that you do is roll over and check email, Facebook, and Twitter on your phone? Or do you just sleep with your laptop on your nightstand? (or in bed with you like a long-lost lover) Do you take your laptop to the couch while watching a movie with friends just to make sure that you don’t miss out on something important…even at 10 pm...even though you're already doing something important?

Since when did checking on the status updates of the world matter more than taking time with your wife, your husband, your children, your friends, or more importantly: God? You do understand that all of those status updates and emails will be there even if you wait just 15 minutes to spend time having breakfast with your kids?

I know that there are times when I am guilty of rolling over and checking my phone out of habit. I mean, I do it all day long to make sure that I haven’t missed anything, all the while missing out on what’s currently happening. (or to be “technically correct”: what’s happening in my live feed.) There are times that I neglect my husband so that I can “just finish this one thing”, and in the same sentence get mad it him for not paying attention to me. It’s a complete double-standard, I know. And what I’ve come to realize is that we all have an addiction that has consumed our every move and thought. We are anxious if we don’t check everything right now, because we’ve made ourselves believe that if we don’t do it right now, then something could be missed…or we could be expelled from the universe. Who knows what irrational thought process you’ve designed for yourself to rationalize your information/technology consumption. And on top of all that, we can’t see our own mistake to realize when we are guilty.

A while back, I remember hearing about an article that someone wrote about our information-consumed generation, and he challenged people to not let the glow of their phones and computers be the last thing they see before they go to bed, and not be the first thing they see when they woke up. (DO NOT GO TOWARDS THE LIGHT!!) We have the rest of the day to be engrossed in work and the “need-to-know" to be let that consume our brains before we close our eyes.

So challenge yourself to be interested in the world of the living around you. I know that I will be. The people around you care about you and want to be with you. They want you to turn off everyone and everything else when you sit down for dinner, and show them that they matter. I’m pretty sure that there were a couple of statements like: “Treat others how you would want to be treated…” and “Actions speak louder than words”. Seems pretty important, and I would bet that your life would look and feel much more fulfilling if you lived by these simple statements. And at the very least when you follow these, you are showing your loved ones value, which could change the very course of their day.

I Create, Therefore I Am.

2010-07-22T10:04:00.002-05:00

Ever wonder what you’re supposed to be doing with your life? I do all the time. But I think that I have finally entered into the world of The Creative. Anything that gives me the opportunity to be creative is where I thrive and grow. But I haven’t always been this way. I’ve struggled along the way to figure out just what I am supposed to be doing. But they always say, “Better late then never!”

Some people have known what they wanted to “be when they grow up” since they were kids. My husband is one of those. He knew after his first paid show at 11 (he made a whopping $25) that he was going to be an entertainer when he grew up. (check him out at www.HarrisIII.com) Now, along the way he’s branched into other passions he has with business and entrepreneurship. He does all of those things alongside being an entertainer. Everything that he has his hands in fits with what he loves and how he wants to propel his business forward.

I am a little more free-spirited than that. More fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants is how I live life. I have my hands in multiple projects, learning, trying things out, and wandering around a little. I’m sure there are times that I appear just as dazed and confused as when I started, but I am on a journey. I have written, painted, cooked, designed, attempted new languages, sewn, created, acted, psychologized, and started businesses on this journey. Each one has been a point of growth for me no matter whether I’ve failed or succeeded at it. I have managed to learn a lot about myself and have flexed and re-shaped my personality, all the while learning what I love and realizing what I’m good at.

I consistently find myself creating and re-creating. It encompasses each area that I venture into. I love the artist part of my life because it gives me, “…Freedom for the full expression of my personality.” (Gandhi) There are no parameters to stay within and I can send my mind to the edges of the Universe for ideas. With this type of freedom, the possibilities are quite literally, endless.

As for what's happening in my life, next year has set itself up to be new and exciting for me on so many levels. I have officially started to peek my head around the corner of possibility. I have new art in the works, 2 new businesses to launch, and multiple partnerships with Global social justice organizations rocking and rolling. I am, for lack of better words, stoked. (and extraordinarily busy) I find myself, for the first time ever, pushing myself to the point of being nervous in business, art, and changing the world. I have a great team and group of friends that are encouraging me along the way. It's because of God's grace and amazing people like my husband, my friends, my family, and our former church community at The Journey Church that I am where I am today.

A Mind Full of Spanglish.

2010-07-20T10:00:00.043-05:00

I am always a little giddy when we have the opportunity to head to a Spanish-speaking country because I get a chance to put 4 years of high school Spanish and 2 years of college Spanish (thanks mom and dad) to "good use". In other words, I have the opportunity to mumble out a few "Hello's", "How old are you", and "Goodbyes" while trying desperately in my head to work up enough courage to attempt something more daring like "What's up?", "I enjoyed being here", and "More ice cream, please." Alas, I am afraid that I'm doomed to speak my Spanglish like a true American on this trip.

It's not that I don't understand Spanish, I understand quite a bit. It's that I'm terrified to say something wrong, and I suck at remembering all of the tenses, so I just keep my mouth shut and nod politely. And what gets me excited about coming to Spanish-speaking countries is that I have the chance to try, learn, and remember all of the words that I've forgotten in the last 12 years.

Let me give you an ejemplo of what I'm talking about.

{child}: "Hola senora. Que Pasa? Me llamo Gabriella."

{me}: "uh...Hola."

{me in my head}: "Just say it in Spanish! You know how! Tell her: Hola Gabriella! Soy muy bien, gracias. Y, Tu? Me llamo Kate."

{child}: (staring at me like I've lost my mind because I've frozen)

{me in my head}: "why don't you just say it?"

{me}: "uh...me llamo Kate. How many anos tienes? No no no no....Cuantos anos tienes? My Spanish es mas worse de tu."

{me in my head}: "Not even close. A little faster on the delivery next time there Speedy Gonzales."

{child}: "Um, okay....adios"

{me}: "Adios!"

{me in my head}: "crap...you just showed a 5 year old what 6 years of great education can do for someone. You had this one in the bag, and you threw it all away you wimp! She was 5!!!"

Okay, maybe I exaggerated a little. I know how to communicate, on some level, with a 5 year old. On occasion, when I feel really brave, I communicate with an adult (because teenagers are intimidating in any language). And I really do understand and know what I should say. Why don't I just do it? Fear? I want to communicate more than anything. I just don't, and it really bugs me.

Someday I hope to be conversational in at least 5 languages (not including English). For the sake of the college dollars my parents spent on my education (and my own sanity), I will start with Spanish. I don't have that far to go to become at least conversational. It will just take focus. After I get that down, I'd like to move on to Italian, Thai, Mandarin, and Portuguese. This will take some serious time, and I know that I have terrible Chinglish, but I'm hopeful. In the meantime, I will just keep trying.

With that I will salida to mi cama para el noche. Buenos tardes amigos!

Have a Little Compassion

2010-07-19T12:14:00.005-05:00

Every time that we leave the country for work, I become acutely aware of the needs of people. Whether it's food, clean water, schools, or jobs, everyone has a need for something. I know that there are hundreds, possibly thousands, of organizations around the globe that are designed to give aid to those people. Take your time and read through this post and click through some of the websites for a better understanding of everything that they do and offer.

There are clean water groups like Blood Water Mission and Charity Water who take their donations and provide wells and filtration systems for people in depressed areas without clean water. Through those systems, they also are battling the AIDS pandemic in Africa. And in case you weren't already aware, almost a billion people don't have access to clean water. One billion people.

There are groups like Invisible Children who are using, "...film, creativity, and social action to end the use of child soldiers in Joseph Kony's rebel war and restore Northern Uganda to peace and prosperity." The use of child soldiers has been a reality of the people of Uganda for the last 23 years. They are abducted walking down the street to school and from their homes at night. Once taken, they are forced to participate in killing, looting, drugs, and war, oftentimes being the ones sent to the front lines to check for land mines. The war has been nothing short of horrific for the people who live in daily fear in Uganda, and Invisible Children is fighting to educate and bring this warlord to his knees to end the fighting.

There are groups that many of us have heard of and maybe even been a participant of such as World Vision, Compassion International, and Holt International just to name a few. These programs all offer child sponsorship. Don't be misled to think that every sponsorship program operates the same way. Each group is completely unique in their focus and the way they do things.

World Vision offers both child sponsorships as well as a huge world relief fund. They are consistently first on the ground when there is a natural disaster and work fast and furiously to get people all of the things that need, whether that's food, water, construction materials, or medicine.

Compassion International has "projects" set up in over 25 countries. These projects are a partnership between Compassion and the local church in that country to offer schooling, food, and basic life skills. And because they are partnered with the local church, they offer Bible classes for both the kids and their families.

Holt International is a sponsorship program that deals with orphans and kids in need. Holt is the world's largest international adoption agency, and with their new sponsorship program, money goes towards medical needs, foster care, and anything else that a child would need in those crucial first few years of life. They work directly with adoption organizations and orphanages that are established in those countries, connecting people and children on a short-term (6-18 month) help basis.

Like I said, these are just a few of the larger organizations that are out there. When you think of helping people in some way, don't forget the thousands of missionaries that are on the front lines working hard in places many of these organizations can't get to. They are building schools, medical clinics, church buildings, and helping young entrepreneurs get small business off the ground through micro-loans. (Check out Kiva and Samaritan's Purse) They need support just like any other group, and if you believe in what they're doing, you can donate regularly to only them. They are all doing their part in trying to make this world a better, more live-able place.

When you read about all of these things, do you roll your eyes and say to yourself, "Another person trying to make me feel bad so that I give money."? Do you discuss the weights of the world over a $5 cup of Starbucks coffee, and then tell yourself that you don't have the money because times are difficult and the economy is bad? There are hundreds of options and ways to make a huge difference in the world, and there are too many of us sitting around wondering what to do, yet keeping our wallets closed. It doesn't take much. Maybe a little bit of sacrifice for some, but if you were to really sit down and look at where all your money goes, you would realize that $20 here and $40 there once a month (or even less) really isn't a big loss. There are too many people in the world suffering for us to sit around and be selfish.

I have over 800 followers on Facebook and another 250 on Twitter. That doesn't even include the occasional reader who happens upon my blog or people who read a re-tweet by someone else. That's a lot of people who can do a lot of amazing things for this world. So I am posting a challenge to anyone who follows me on Facebook, Twitter, or this blog to "have a little compassion" and make the sacrifice to do something. There are great options that I've listed and there are hundreds more if you just do a search. Get concerned about something...anything...and we can join in the change. And this isn't just for Christians. This is for humanity. We are able to better our world...which is something every human on this earth should be a part of. But that being said, Jesus commanded it of His followers. He commanded us to remember the least of these and to take care of the widows and orphans. He commanded us to be His hands and feet. So it's time to do something.

Let me know if you decide to do so or need a little help figuring it all out. I'm here to help you help others and would love to hear where the journey decides to take you. :)

The Christians Are Coming!!

2010-07-17T20:01:00.000-05:00

After spending a whole day hopping from airport to airport trying to get to Nicaragua, I realized 3 things.

1.) I am not a fan of anything “airport”. They are frustrating and inconvenient and I don’t enjoy being rushed from one counter to another trying to make sure that everything is as it should be. And I hate being told when I can and can’t pee.

2.) Starbucks is everywhere…which is amazing when you’re traveling.

3.) When a Christian group is taking a missions trip, you can spot them from a hundred miles away. Why? Bright colored t-shirts exclaiming that these are the “First Baptist Church Crusaders” on “Mission Nicaragua 2010”. Hard to miss alongside the socks with sandals, girls in skirts (because that’s what Christian girls wear), and pleated Dockers. And I understand the use of similar shirts or hats when traveling. Groups are easier to keep together and locate.

Don’t take my sarcasm the wrong way. I think that missions trips are important and that at some time or another, everyone (not just the Christians) should go on one. They will change your life if you let them. I have been on them, and I love going out and serving. The problem is that we make an entrance that screams “I’m here to save the day!!”, and the “We came to love you” part gets lost behind tracks and graphic tees that are all the same. We get wrapped up in making sure that we look the part of the good, American Christian, that we forget how little it means to those you are going to serve. They see your agenda.

My husband joked that the Christians in the airport that were heading out to other countries were similar to the British who marched up the Eastern Coast at the start of the Revolutionary War. They are marching right down the avenue wearing their bright red outfits, weapons in hand, giant crosses on their uniforms. Easy to spot and know what they’re here for. And then there’s Paul Revere riding as fast as he can to announce to the sleeping world that “The British are coming! The British are coming!!” Not exactly the entrance the British were hoping for, I would guess.

Is that how we look to those we are trying to serve? A bunch of soldiers in uniform marching in with our Bibles and quick answers, ready for battle and wanting everyone to know it? Sometimes all that’s missing is Paul Revere riding ahead to warn everyone so that they can brace for impact. Again, don’t take my words wrong. I’m not saying this is a representation of everyone who goes on a missions trip. And I’m not saying that we are interested in marching in like soldiers ready for battle. Many people go on missions trips to serve and love and take care of orphans. Some go because they’ve never been out of the country and Mexico sounds like they have good beaches. There are those that go out of obligation. And there are those that go because the rest of the world is “lost” and they have to convert the masses. To say that no one has an agenda when they are on a mission trip is both naïve and incorrect. Everyone has an agenda. The question is what is it and can the people see it coming.

I think the question I beg to ask is why must Christians (specifically the American ones) present themselves in a way that screams “You’re lost and I have all the answers”? Why can’t we come in and defy the norm. Instead of standing out because we look like a parade, why can’t we let our actions and our love speak for us? What’s with the need to compensate? I find it hard to believe that someone like Jesus was going around and telling people about his Father with a group of followers dressed in uniform. He simply loved them. He met them where they were at and never looked down on anyone. He just was.

So instead of heading out to other countries looking like a cheesy church group, why not try just being yourself and being the Church. If being yourself includes black socks with sandals, then so be it. Just don’t go looking like an actor playing a role. People want relationships. They want you to get to know who they are and what their struggles are. They want to be loved and prayed for. And if you love your neighbor, as God commanded, it will speak volumes more than your cross necklaces worn as identification.

Jesus commands us to do two things: Love God. Love people. Everything else falls into place around those 2 commands. Don’t try to overcompensate.

The Perspective of Reality.

2010-07-17T19:51:00.000-05:00

My husband and I are taking off to Nicaragua to perform for the next couple of days. It was a last-minute opportunity that we were thrilled about taking. Though we have both spent time in Central America, Nicaragua has yet to be one of the places that we've visited. And despite the threat of hurricane-type weather, we are stoked!

Ever since we first went out of the country together to El Salvador in 2005, my husband and I try to take the time for at least 6-8 weeks outside of the States serving and relaxing. We have realized that it's necessary for us to leave the States to keep our focus and to balance our lives.

I will be the first person to say that I love America. I love the rights we are allowed to exercise daily that so many other nations can’t, and I love that we are a nation that embraces uniqueness and freedom. However, as an American, it's easy to lack perspective on reality. There are millions of people all over the world who live on less than 1% of what we do. There are millions of displaced children because of war, famine, AIDS, and other manageable illnesses who sleep and live in fear daily. There are millions of people imprisoned because of faith and lack of faith everywhere. There are millions of women and children trafficked every year to labor camps, sweat shops, and into sex slavery. Poverty, lack of freedoms, hunger, and fear is a daily reality for most of the world. Yet here in America, we get upset that we don't have enough money for that 2000 square foot home in suburbia; that we can't get financing for that BMW; and that we have to pay for our own healthcare. We, the people of the wealthiest country in the world, are busy whining for handouts and payouts because that's what we deserve, all the while forgetting about the reality of everyone else. And you wonder why Americans have a bad rap in other countries?

When you leave America for another country, you have the ability to gain immeasurable amounts of perspective if you are paying attention. If you realize all of the freedoms that you have, you are less likely to whine about the small things and instead be thankful. For me, every time I head to another location outside of the States, I take the time to listen and see the things around me. I ask questions about culture, food, and customs in an attempt to understand the people better. And I try (though sometimes failing miserably) to learn a little bit of the language. You would be surprised at how valued the locals feel when you sample their crazy food and try to communicate with them in their own language. You are showing both honor and respect, as well as that it's not all about you and your preferences. And ultimately, people will open their lives and homes to you, more often than not, helping you learn and become a better person.

You can gain the perspective of reality anywhere in the world. You don't have to be in a third world country to see how the rest of the world operates. I would challenge anyone to put yourself out there and open up your mind and heart to all of the things that this world both offers and needs. And I would challenge anyone to take a trip, with that open mind and heart, to anywhere else in the world and take in the culture and the people. You will realize so much about yourself and what's really important in life. It will force you to slow down and take time to smell the proverbial roses. There’s a reason why in Latin America, people take a siesta in the middle of the day and don’t stress out about being on time….anywhere. (even though it still drives me batty!) There’s a reason why in Eastern Asia people socialize and eat food together in open markets all day and night. They love company and see it as a healthy part of everyday life. And just like those in Latin America…they don’t mind taking their time. (maybe we should see the trend?)

Just for the record, I haven’t always had perspective. Instead, I had done a great job of building a bubble around my life and filling it with the things that mattered to no one else but me. They were selfish and self-serving, mattering very little at the end of the day. I had made my life about my own comfort, worrying regularly that I didn’t have what it took, that I would never have enough, and that no one could possibly like me unless I had all of those things that “matter” to the world. How wrong was I. After spending those 10 days in El Salvador, I realized that there is huge world out there full of people who love deeply, work hard, and don’t drive a white Mini convertible. But they did have one thing that I didn’t: Joy. I had all of the things that I could have wanted at the time, yet I was empty and unhappy. I wanted the joy that they had. The joy that was genuine and found in the simplest of things.

Over time, I have traveled to 10 more countries, and have gained valuable perspective on things that matter to the world and that here in America we have a tendency to overlook and understate because they are not our reality. The statistics are staggering and you can find the numbers anywhere, but when you look in the eyes of a child bought and sold for sex, in the eyes of a poor mother trying to keep her children fed and clothed, felt the touch of a blind orphan, and seen the smiles of the forgotten, the nice cars and clothes and vacations will melt away and become nothing more than a vapor.

Jesus commanded us to take care of the widows and the orphans. And more importantly to love our neighbor as ourselves. Just because they don’t live next door or are part of our immediate group of friends does not mean that they are not our neighbors. If they are human, they are our neighbors and loved by God.

So what is your perspective of reality, and what will you do about it?

Just Another Blog Post.

2010-07-15T14:20:00.000-05:00

If I were to be completely honest with you, I would tell you that I am writing this post because I want to...not because I have some sort of profound content to discuss or a rant that I would like to extend to the masses. I just felt like blogging. More like, I just felt like clearing my head.

I have found blogging to be one of the most relaxing, invigorating, and pleasant things to have in my life. I need it. I'm not quite sure how I've managed to live so long without it. I've always journaled, and on occasion I still do when it's a more private topic, but this is a whole new world for me. (Insert "Aladdin" soundtrack here for nostalgic purposes) I find blogging more than just a way to organize my thoughts and share my opinions. It's a place of refuge. It's a place to be honest with others and myself in a way that just is. And I thrive here.

I found out recently that there are people who get paid lots of money to blog, and I thought to myself, "What a perfect job for me!" And then I realized that unless you are a celeb who blogs (legit blogging...not a manager or other staff member) or are writing about business, or are a mom blogger, you don't get paid. And I am none of those things. So no money here. But even if it was for one fleeting moment, I wondered what it would be like to just be and be paid to do something I love. And then I thought a little harder and realized that it's already a reality for me.

I am a painter, a creator, an artist, an actress, a thinker, and a writer. All of those thing I love and they all give me the opportunity to just be. And I get paid for it. Call it luck, but I call it choice. We all have gifts and abilities that were bestowed on us. Some of those gifts we call "hobbies", or "those things that I love that I don't get paid for". Sometimes when I'm asked what I do and reply "artist", I am given that little smirk that says "a girl with her head in the clouds...just another starving artist". Little do they know that there are few days that I hate my life (because my work is my life) and if you saw a picture of me, I'm clearly not starving. :) I am free to do all of the things that I am good at and more. And the choice was mine. I could have very easily just sat around and wasted my life away crying "poor me", but what's the point? I know too many people that are in jobs that they hate and refuse to get out of. Now, I understand that we all have to be responsible and take care of our bills, so there are those stepping blocks along the way. I have had jobs that I hated just like anyone else. But instead of just wishing for more, I sought out more. I created more opportunities to do what I love. And along the way I realized something very important: who I am.

It's like a friend of mine who I've know most of my life who was smart enough to do anything. After college, she got married and had a normal job. But she had always loved photography, and she was good at it. But instead of just allowing it be a mere hobby, she did something about it. She started to take a lot of pictures and learned everything that she could about cameras, lighting, and lenses. She went to sessions and conventions all over the States, and then she took her brilliant creativity and did what she does best: take pictures. And I must say, she's one of the most talented (and sought after) photographers that I know, and if you're ever out in Southern California, she's your girl! (Check out Katie Neal Photography) But the point is that she worked hard and followed her dreams. She played her cards and capitalized on her strengths.

So once again, here I am. Writing down my thoughts and hoping that maybe something that I have to say will resonate with someone else. Maybe there was someone else who just needed an extra push. Just don't let it be just another blog post....

If You Ask Me Again, I'll Scream.

2010-07-08T08:20:00.001-05:00

Dear People of this Universe:

I am not pregnant. Just fat. I hate when you ask me "When are you due?" It is both awkward and embarrassing for both of us. I'm not sure why you would have the audacity to ask such a horrible question in the first place. In the words of Brian Regan: "Don't guess that ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever..." You apparently didn't have enough "ever"'s memorized.

I am working hard to correct this problem so that you won't ever be confused into thinking that again. But in the meantime, if you ask or guess or tell someone else that you think that I am, I will not be happy. I will do everything in my power to make you feel as embarrassed as possible for even asking. If I ever am pregnant, I will TELL YOU. Just check Facebook and Twitter and this blog. You won't have to guess.

Thanks,

One Very NOT Pregnant (and ticked off) Woman.

My Life In Emoticons

2010-07-07T11:12:00.002-05:00

I find myself attaching emoticons to just about every text or email or Twitter update without even thinking. More often than not, they are little smiley faces or the one with the winking eye (we call them "winky face"). But I've realized that as I attach those little emotion indicators, I don't really think about how I really feel. I just attach them on a whim.

We live in a world of social networking, instant communication, and blogging. We throw our lives out there for the world to see, and follow the status updates of friends to make sure that we are kept in-the-loop. I know that I'm guilty of posting status updates to Twitter and Facebook whether I'm in a good mood or a bad mood, oftentimes hoping for encouragement, a quick laugh, or someone to just empathize with me. But as good intentioned as the 1000 people that are my "Friends" are, I never really feel like I can be truly authentic. I continue to try and ride the line so that I press just enough to get a small reaction, but I'm not trying to piss anyone off. But why? Why I am so desperate for comments but not all that willing to be totally honest? Why do I make smart-ass comments and then attach the little smiley to it so as to soften the blow?

I think that we have created a world where we beg for authenticity, but it's completely superficial. We want to seem authentic, but our real motive is to post enough online to keep people semi-informed so that they don't forget that we exist. I mean let's be honest...if you're not on Facebook or Twitter or have some sort of online presence, you don't exist. People want to keep tabs and feel involved and if you're not there, then you become little more than a vapor.

I had a conversation with some friends last night about a church that we had been attending. It was amazing to find that we all had some of the same concerns and frustrations (which was why we had been on a church hiatus), and wanted so much more out of our experience there. But we had all been silent, hiding behind smiles and excuses of being busy. We had the opportunity to be honest, and we had shared only partial truth on occasion, or it was avoided at all costs in order to keep the waters calm. (I try to be more of silent type because of my opinionated personality). But the four of us knew that in order for things to result in change, we needed to have a voice and be honest not only with ourselves, but others. No more emoticons.

Is it possible to be completely authentic online, or even in person for that matter? Or are we doomed to spend the rest of our lives hiding behind the smiley faces? I'm not sure that it's possible to answer. So many of us have been burned by people, businesses, and churches that we don't know who or how to trust. Because of this pseudo-relational world that we've created, we have a hard time living in reality. I do know, however, that I want a real community of people that knows that I am who I am, which means that some days will be amazing, and some will suck. I don't want to be around people that talk behind my back, have alterior motives, or just plain old don't like me for me. In a "how many friends/followers do you have" world, I find myself totally uninterested in "Keeping up with the Kardashians".

So you can be a friend of mine of Facebook, or follow me on Twitter, or even read my blog, but know that I am attaching a disclaimer of sorts to all of those things and it looks something like this:

WARNING:

Opinions expressed here are the opinion of Kate Harris only.

You are not obligated to agree or care either way.

Kate Harris strives for honesty and authenticity on Facebook, Twitter and her Blog.

If you don't like the way she does things, then there are plenty of people who exist in pseudo-reality that you are more than welcome to follow to make yourself feel better.

Kate Harris will challenge herself and you, if you so choose.

Follow her at your own risk.

If this doesn't suit you, then that's okay. I'm just making sure that everyone is aware that my intentions are not piss off, but to strive for something more in this online (and not online) world. And the next time you are having a horrible day, don't attach the smiley emoticon to your status. Just be honest. I'm no guru or psychologist, but I do know that when I'm honest with both myself and others, working through this thing called life gets just a little bit easier and has less surprises.

Burn Baby Burn!

2010-07-06T17:09:00.003-05:00

2010 is the year of changes in the Harris household. We decided at the end of last year to make 2010 the year that we were gonna get healthy. There was no doubt in our minds that we had put on the pounds and were having more and more difficulty keeping up with all the things we had in queue. From performing, to painting, to loading and unloading, to just basic everyday activities, we were out of shape!

So we began our research at the local Barnes and Noble, looking for a little bit of guidance to get us a jump start on our new life. I'm not sure if you've ever browsed the shelves at Barnes and Noble looking for health books, but they span at least 4 sections. There are books on the South Beach diet, Atkins diet, liquid diets, master cleanses, and hundreds more in the category of get-slim-quick. Nothing that we were really looking for since we wanted a lifestyle change to be healthy. We wanted something that would helps us pick the right foods and exercise programs for our bodies (you have to remember that not everyone is the same) that would have a lasting effect. Something that we could keep up for a long time. Again, we found very little and left Barnes and Noble wondering what in the world we should be doing.

From friends and late-night infomercials, we had heard about a workout set that came in the form of DVD's. I'm pretty sure that you've all heard of P90X. Most people have one reaction to the workout, and that's "Holy crap! That stuff is so hard! I gave up after about 10 minutes." But, since my husband and I are mildly competitive and always enjoy a challenge, we started our Craigslist hunt for a used set. Funny enough, there are dozens of these DVD sets available, many unopened. We started out doing just the 45 minute Cardio X DVD, and found that though it was really difficult (I mean come on...we were out of shape!) we actually enjoyed it. Slowly we added in the Kenpo X, and when we really felt ambitious: the Ab Ripper. Again, it was difficult, but because January through April involves a lot of traveling, it was about all we could do.

Now insert healthy eating. Harris, my husband, cut out fried foods, fast food, and tons of processed food. I became a pescatarian, which means that I'm a vegetarian that eats seafood (mostly fresh fish), and cut out all soda and sweets. There was a huge change in our physical appearance just from a small amount of working out 5 days a week and eating healthier than we had before. By mid-February, I had lost about 5 pounds. (My goal is closer to 50). So we knew that we were on the right track, just needed to amp it up.

In March, we joined forces with a personal trainer named Michael Tugo. He owns a studio in Green Hills called Body Sculpting. This is when the real magic started to happen! He challenged us to cut out diary, eat tons more greens, more protein for my husband, and no carbonation. The less food was processed, the better. We would be in the gym for at least an hour with him 3 days a week lifting weights and challenging our bodies. On our free days, we were encouraged to do cardio for at least 30 minutes. In the first 4 weeks, I lost 8 pounds. I was stoked! With the lack of dairy in my body and working really hard in the gym, I was feeling lighter and full of energy. We worked hard for 90 days, all the while touring.

Today, I have lost 20 pounds and 2 pants sizes. I know that I still have a lot of hard work ahead of me, but it's doable and totally worth it! Just looking at pictures of me from 90 days ago, it's hard to believe how bad and puffy I looked! I had no idea! But again, I am hopeful and looking forward to what the next 90 days have in store for me! If you think that there's some sort of "magic pill" that will make you lose weight, you're partially right. There are thousands of "quick fix" diets that are just that: a quick fix. They have no lasting power and will not make you a healthy person. You can't eat whatever you want, whenever you want, and not exercise, and still think that you're going to lose weight. It takes hard work. It takes focus. It takes a lifestyle change and willpower. I know that I feel better right now then I have in years. And I am enjoying my life all the more!

Burn, baby burn!

But what does it mean? (part 4)

2010-07-05T12:43:00.000-05:00

"Liquid"

48x60

This is the largest canvas painting that I've done to-date. (The largest painting I've done was a commission for a 72x72) I had seen this giant canvas at the art supply store on more than one occasion and I had always said to myself that I wanted to paint something this big. When I finally took the plunge and bought this giant piece, I let it sit in my studio for a good 2 weeks and I stared at it. I wanted to make sure whatever it was that I painted would be new and creative.

Now, to be completely transparent as an artist, I had no idea what I wanted to paint. I was at a complete loss and thought I had actually run out of creativity! I know that you can't really "run out" of creativity, but there was still a small side of me that panicked and wondered if this was going to be the end of my painting career. Then I did something that's really hard for me to do: I let go. I let go of the insecurities that I had as a novice painter (the idea that nothing is good enough) and just let my brain relax. That's when I got the idea for "Liquid".

The background of the painting is a deep blue that was washed with a dark brown over the top of it. The red paint was a level 1 acrylic that I poured into a paper cup and mixed it with warm water. When I got it to the right consistency, I just poured it right onto the canvas. When the red had partially dried, I took a turquoise blue and mixed it water, pouring it directly over the red paint. The result is what you see in this picture of the painting. It was amazing to watch the transformation take place from a plain white canvas to this expression.

This painting is unlike anything I've ever done. I have stretched my wings and begun the journey to see what I'm capable of creating, and this is just a scratch on the surface.

But what does it mean? (part 3)

2010-07-02T11:05:00.000-05:00

"Vintage Piano"

24x48

Though I didn't grow up in Nashville (or really Tennessee for the matter), I completely understand the drive of the music forces here. Not only do I have a lot of musician friends, I know that you can see just about any type of show any night of the week here in the city. Nashville lives and breathes music...country, rock and roll, indie, Gospel, and so much more. So I did this piece as a little homage to the musician inside all of us.

Growing up, I played piano like most of did when we were young. I had a love-hate relationship with those piano playing years because I loved to play...I just hated to practice. We had an ancient upright piano in our living room that had been passed down to my mother from her father. The wood was discolored, it constantly had to be re-tuned, and the ivory keys were worn, chipped, and stained from years of dirty hands. When I wasn't practicing, I loved to play. I could play by ear (which is not the case anymore since I haven't played in 15 years) and would try to pick up songs that I heard on the radio or at other concerts. I would buy sheet music that was much more difficult than I could handle, determined to learn it. That old piano took a beating from my grimy fingers, but we had a bond, music and I. After I became a teenager, I stopped playing almost completely and forgot so many of the basics. I would only play alongside friends as we joked around playing "Heart and Soul", which just about anyone knows a variation of. Because of my lack of interest in playing, the old piano got further and further out of tune, neglected and disowned. My mom and dad eventually got rid of the piano to make space for something else, but I will never forget the years I spent sitting on that bench, barely able to reach the pedals, or make my fingers wide enough to pound out an octave. Those few years of piano lessons taught me patience and a love for music, even though I'm no musician.

Whether by vocation, by hobby, or just those of us who love music...this is piece is for you. May we never forget the old times, the memories, the love, and things that made us who we are today.

But what does it mean? (Part 2)

2010-06-30T08:12:00.000-05:00

"Rain"

24x48

"Made of different stuff than when I began..."

(written around the border of painting)

This is the one of the first true expression pieces that I did after I began to paint. (This is not the original, someone owns that, but this is the second one). When I sat down to paint this particular piece, I let a blank canvas sit in front of me while I listened to music on my iPod, hoping for a little inspiration. I knew that I wanted to paint something a little more layered that had depth and meaning to it, but I wasn't sure how I was going to do that. As I sat there, a song by Brooke Frasier came on. "Shadowfeet"(from the Albertine album) As the long started out, she sang, "I am changing, less and less asleep, made of different stuff than when I began..." That's when it hit me. I had changed. I was "awake" and "aware", having moved out of my old self and into my new self. Now, don't think I'm going all new-agey on you, we all change. We all have an event (or multiple events) that change our direction and our outlook. Mine was that I had found God and found a church.

In 2005, my husband Harris and I joined the Journey Church in Franklin, TN. http://journeyfranklin.com/ It was a church plant by Pastor Jamie George, and it changed our lives. In short, I found God there. He had been waiting on the sidelines for me to finally recognize that I wanted Him and needed Him. He had been so patient and graceful in my blatant disrespect and lack of loyalty. See, I had known God my whole life. Even considered myself a "Christian" because I had "prayed the prayer". But my life reflected nothing of who God is. It was simply all about me and my comfort. I chose God when it was convenient...even though He had always chosen me.

After being a part of the Journey Church for a year, it clicked. I was tired of the game of trying to live more than one life. I was tired of running away and making it all about me. I wanted so much more. I wanted real life. Real joy. Real love. And the simple line out of "Shadowfeet" jumped out at me as a testament to my life. So I began to paint. I painted the city as a sign of my community. The clouds hung above the city as normal rain clouds do, however, they were not "normal" clouds. They were raining buttons. Hundreds of buttons. This was me. I look physically the same, yet I was exuding something entirely different in my life. I was standing out among those around me. I was showing people that everything that I valued and everything that's inside of me is not what it seems at a quick glance. I knew that when I open up my life, you would see a difference. I will communicate differently. I will care differently and deeply. I will love my spouse differently. I love my Creator differently.

After serving and attending Journey Church for 4 years, my husband and I moved 45 minutes away. Because Journey Church would no longer be an extension of our community, we knew that we would find a new church family closer to where we lived. Before leaving, I went to Jamie and gave him the original of this painting as reminder that he done exactly as God had asked him. He had brought the lost to Him. Jamie had helped me dig deep and discover that there was so much more. And as I was leaving, I told him that if he continued to do what we was doing, there should be a thousand more of these paintings showing what peoples' lives had become after learning the truth. There would be no other option than to "rain" differently.

More Bars in More Places...or Not?

2010-06-29T17:04:00.000-05:00

*(No names will be changed to protect the "innocent", because we all know AT&T is crappy. Only the "girl" will remain anonymous)

Once upon a time, there was a girl who had a mediocre phone (a Blackberry) with a great cellular company called Sprint. She loved her cell phone service. It worked no matter where she was and never dropped a single call in over 8 years. All was well in the world because she could literally make a phone call whenever, wherever, without having to worry.

Then it happened: Apple unveiled the greatest thing to ever hit the cellular world. It was the iPhone. It was dazzling and could do just about anything her laptop could do...and more! It was the king of all phones. But it was on a different network. It was on AT&T. She cursed Apple for giving their superior phone to such an inferior network, and swore that she wouldn't switch to AT&T just for a phone.

After the iPhone had been around for about a year, Apple did it yet again: they released an even better version of their amazing phone! The girl couldn't believe it!! This phone could do much more than it's counterpart...she had to have one. Besides, sometimes you have to compromise, and AT&T claimed that they had the most coverage and best service than any other network. "More bars in more places". She decided to give it a try. She left Sprint (and the crappy Blackberry) behind and moved on to Apple and the iPhone.

After getting her new phone, the girl noticed a few things. First, she could be at home, downtown Nashville, and have no service. None. She also noticed that she would be talking on the phone and all of a sudden the call would get dropped. "Call Failed" would be the blinking icon on her screen. "Funny," she would say, "I was just talking and the call was going just fine. What happened?" It didn't take long for the girl to become annoyed, something she was never with her previous network. She couldn't go anywhere without having calls dropped and no service. How could this be? She saw the commercials that showed that AT&T covered "97% of the US", but somehow she found herself always in that other 3%. Even in major US cities! And what was even more bizarre was that the service didn't seem to be improving at all. In fact, it felt as if it was getting slower and worse! It was "no bars in all places".

Then Apple made a big announcement that they would be releasing yet another new, superior phone. And the rumor (or maybe it was just more of a hope) was that it would be released from it's contractual obligations with AT&T, and would be available on Verizon, the much better network. The girl had high hopes that it was true. She would gladly give crappy AT&T the $150 it would cost her to get out of her contract early if it meant that she could get the new phone with service that would actually work! But alas, it was too good to be true. Apple stayed with AT&T, even when during a demonstration of the new phone, AT&T's "service" reared it's ugly head and showed the whole world what it was capable of: absolutely nothing.

Today, the girl still has the same iPhone with the same crappy service. She continues to look forward to the day when Apple will realize that it needs a superior network to go with it's superior phone.

The End.

Would you risk it for $22 Billion?

2010-06-28T02:04:00.003-05:00

I'm really not a blogger. At least that's what I sometimes tell myself as I begin to organize my thoughts on my Apple iBook. (I'm old school...for now) The process looks something like this:

1. Get a thought that just kinda sticks in my head.
2. Say to myself, "you should blog about that".
3. Sit down and get about 2-3 paragraphs down.
4. Second-guess my writing skills and wonder if I'm completely wacko for even thinking that someone would be interested in what's going on my head. (it's a jungle in there)
5. Stop writing and leave the draft on my laptop to finish when I become "inspired".
6. Never finish the blog.
7. Tell myself that I'm really not a blogger.
8. Drown my sorrows in a container of raspberry chocolate chunk ice cream

To help you understand how debilitating my blog-phobia is, I just deleted about 30 drafts from my post listings that I'd started and never finished. Not gonna lie, it felt a little depressing and I began wondering "am I really cut out for this whole blogging thing"? I want to be good at it. I Twitter all the time! (sorry for all those of you out there who hate following my seemingly meaningless tweets about going to bed or being at the pool. Some people just really want to know!)

As I was brooding about all of the thoughts that I had never managed to complete, I stumbled across an article on www.cnn.com about a man named Ron Wayne. Now, if you haven't read this story in it's entirety, I suggest that you do so here : http://tinyurl.com/2bm9a3r Mr. Wayne is 76 years old and at one point, was one of the three original founders of Apple. In the beggining, he owned 10% of the company alongside the more popular, Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak. He was quick on his feet, gave answers readily, and knew what he was doing. There was one catch, however. Mr Wayne had a fear that he would acquire lots of debt if the company didn't make it. He knew that they were up against a few competitors (such as Microsoft) and wasn't interested in a "rough ride". So, with that mindset of fear, he left the company for $800 eleven days after Apple was formed. Today, his 10% equity would put his net worth at over $22 billion dollars. Yes....I said billion. He gave it all up out of fear. Didn't think that he could cut it. Didn't think that it would be worth it. Was afraid of the consequences from his past businesses re-playing in this business. If only he had known what the outcome of Apple, Inc. would be. If only he had taken a little bit of risk. Today, Mr. Wayne has all of his money tied up in his coin and stamp collections. That's it. He plays the slots in local Nevada casinos hoping to "strike it rich". If only....

As I read this, I couldn't believe it! A man had given up 10% of his holding in one of the biggest companies in the world for a mere $800!! Was he nuts!? But he couldn't have known that Apple was going to be huge one day. He didn't know that a little bit of risk would go a long way. He had done exactly as I had done with my blogging; he had sat down and began to write a story, only to abandon it shortly after it began. He became afraid, just as I had, that he didn't really have what it took.

I, however, am willing to risk it. Let's not kid ourselves...we all know that there's no $22 billion that will come about from having a small blog with 5-6 followers. But who cares? It's about taking the risk and putting yourself out there in the first place that really matters. It's about recognizing what you're good at and what you love and just doing it! It's about not worrying and running the race as it was meant to be run, not giving up after the first mile or 2 because it's too hard. Just let it go and be yourself. (now I'm sounding like a guru)

To be totally honest, I don't even care if no one ever reads my blog. (And I am, by blogging standards, nobody) It's something that I need to do for me. And if people follow along, then so be it. :)

But what does it mean?

2010-06-26T08:53:00.000-05:00

As both an artist and a lover of art, I know firsthand just how easy it is to paint something that has so much meaning to me, but very little to everyone else. When I paint, it's a part of my soul. It's an expression of emotion and many times a glimpse of what is going on in my life. But if you aren't the artist, it's oftentimes impossible to see that in a simple painting. That being said, I plan on taking a few of my pieces and giving you a glimpse into the soul behind them. The raw emotion. Hopefully then you can have a better understanding of why I do what I do...

"Light"

30x40

"From within or from behind, a light shines through us upon things, and makes us aware that we are nothing, but the light is all." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson (quote lines border)

I was commissioned late last year by a small church group called "House of Light" here in Nashville to do a piece for their opening night of worship. So I sat around for a while and I began to think about what we, as Christians, should look like to the rest of the world in a literal form of light. So I painted the city as a symbol of where many of us live. Then I painted a man holding "balloons" that were a dull ivory color. (the balloons are small stone and ivory buttons) Those balloons were a small representation of complacency, mistrust, lack of care, those who have turned away. Then there was a much larger white button that looks like it has a giant starburst coming out of it. The largest button is a literal representation of of what Christians should look like. We should stand out among the rest. We should be trying to break free from what everyone else would consider "normal". We should be illuminating the world on so many different levels. In reality, just as Emerson said, "...we are nothing, but the light is all."

Hopefully this gives you a little glimpse into what I was trying to say and accomplish in this piece. Maybe it will give you a better appreciation for what the art is saying, all the while being to enjoy pretty art.

As Pablo Picasso once said, "Painting is like keeping a diary". Welcome to mine.

Illusionism.tv

2010-06-25T17:55:00.000-05:00

It's finally here!! For the last year or so, my husband Harris has been working his tail off on a new project: www.illusionism.tv

Illusionism.tv is a membership website where aspiring magicians of all ages can go and learn weekly magic tricks from skilled instructors, upload performance and practice videos, and get advice from friends and other magic aficionados. It is a one-of-a-kind, premiere learning site that is a friendly environment for kids and adults to learn magic together. You can hone your skills as much or as little as you'd like! But the best part is that it helps to maintain the motto that all magicians have: "Magicians never tell their secrets". Because this is a membership website, not just anyone can learn the tricks that you can learn here!

In celebration of the site having officially launched today (June 25th), Illusionism.tv is offering a HUGE lifetime discount that will only be available until July 1st. So be sure to sign up and start learning magic with other magicians! And let your friends and family know to sign up as soon as possible so that they can take advantage of such an awesome discount.

It's been a long and tiresome process, but the anticipation has been nothing short of insanity because we are so excited about it!!

Again, the website is www.illusionism.tv Go check it out!!

One of Those Months

2010-06-23T09:44:00.001-05:00

I know that it's been a while since I've been here to blog, it's definitely something that I have to really work at. I'm much better at micro-blogging on Twitter or reading other peoples' blogs. But I have a few things that I'd like to give people a heads-up on.

For anyone who reads my husbands' blog (http://www.harrisiii.com/harris-iii-blog/), this first little bit isn't going to surprise you. At the end of May, my husband and I found out that our 6 week tour to Thailand in July and part of August had been cancelled due to all of the government protesting and violence that had sprung up over the last couple of months. The small nation went into a state of emergency and began enforcing curfews and suggesting to foreigners not to travel to their country. Public gatherings were also suspended until further notice, which meant that we were not going to be able to hold any shows. Because we found out at the last second, (everyone was hoping that it would be okay and we would be able to come over), we were left with a vacant July and a partially vacant August. No income. Now, I don't know about what kind of jobs you all have, but if you take an unpaid leave of absence for 6 weeks with no other form of income, you might begin to panic when you realize that none of your bills are going to be paid. Welcome to our current state.

Now, all this being said, here's what we've been doing since finding out: we've been racking our brains in an attempt to come up with the money to pay our bills (which we have both personal and business since we are self-employed) for the month of July. It sounds like a lot, but our bills for both exceed $8000. Some of our income in June will carry over, but because of some recent big expenses with our travel vehicle (it keeps breaking down), we don't have as much in the bank. My husband has been on the phone with tons of people looking for ways that we offer our talents to both churches as well as locally to theaters. I have been busy fulfilling art commissions and getting updated photos online.

Because we work together 12 months out of the year, we would consider doing nothing less than that same thing right now. So we have split up the income so that we can carry this burden together. Normally I am able to sell art when people are interested in it and come to me. This next month is going to be a little different. I am taking a step to expedite the sale of art by offering everything that I currently have as inventory as well as commissions at a 20% discount. This offer is only good for the month of July. That being said, please check out my Facebook fan page for updated photos of everything that I have. My goal is to bring in $4000 in July. That's all. I am willing to take commissions, sell what I currently have, or duplicate if possible. If you aren't interested in art for yourself, I encourage you to tell your friends and family and pass on the info to them. The more people that can see it, the better.

So please take a look at my fan page on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/kateharrisart Check the photo albums for pictures and pricing. If you find yourself interested, you can either message me directly on Facebook, or email me at kate@kateharrisart.com Your support in this time of need would be greatly appreciated, and know that we aren't asking for a handout...we are working hard for it!

Here are a few of the most popular pieces that I have just to give you an idea:

"Vintage Piano"

24x48

normally $595

now $475

"Liquid"

48x60

normally $895

now $715

"Dandelion"

30x40

normally "595

now $475

"Light"

30x40

normally $400

now $320

Hitting the Road

2010-04-10T10:03:00.000-05:00

It's that time of year where about a dozen of us pile into our travel vehicles and hit the road to entertain the masses. It's tour season.

I guess you could say that the "season" actually started yesterday when our cast and crew got into town. Today we are organizing and packing gear, cleaning out the trucks and vans, and making sure that we have everything that we need. Seems easy, but it's definitely a long process and can require a lot of running back and forth. But we all love it, which is what keeps us coming back season after season to work long days and get paid a lot less.

Yes, we get paid a lot less for all the work that we do. You would think that a large tour (there's anywhere from 10-14 in our touring cast and crew) would make more money. But that's not the case. Though our fees are higher, our expenses are higher and there's a lot more people that need to get paid. But at the end of the day, it's not about the money for any of us. It's about doing what we love and being together as one big family. It's amazing the relationships that you build when you spend every day traveling together. I have a friend, Beth, who is my husband's assistant, but also one of my best friends. Tour season is great for us to hang out, catch up, laugh, and play lots of cards.

So needless to say, I'm looking forward to tour season. It lasts for 5 short weekends and will take us to Florida, Georgia, Missouri, Iowa, Indiana, Michigan, Ohio, and Oklahoma respectively. We will work the hardest we work all year in these next few weekends, but it's gonna be fun! I will be sure to keep you all posted on our journey.

Being Healthy

2010-04-01T08:21:00.000-05:00

It's officially been 1 week since I entered the gym. To say that I feel completely at home there is an understatement. I love to learn, therefore, all the training that I have been getting has been a learning experience and I am soaking it up. It's amazing. I have been going almost every day (I train 3 days a week) trying to squeeze in extra workouts. It's become kind of addicting....and yes, I know it's the gym.

But I realized something while walking up what seemed like 200 flights of stairs on the stairmaster. I realized that I need more positive environments in my life. Thy gym that I go to is full of positive energy that propels you forward, sometimes without you even realizing it. Every person in there wants to be there and wants to be healthy. And they want others that walk through that door to experience the same things that are. Strength, flexibility, endurance. In total, a better way of life. One that makes their days brighter and puts a bounce in their step.

Why is it that I feel this in the gym surrounded by people I barely know? Why do they encourage me and push me to do better and vie for a healthy lifestyle? It doesn't do anything for them to do all these things.

I guess the question that I'm getting at is why do I feel all these amazing things in the gym that I should feel when I go to church...but I don't? Walking into a building on Sunday filled with people who are "Christians" leaves me walking out frustrated and disillusioned. I don't have that same bounce in my step. That same sense of encouragement for a "healthy" life. Those people who are encouraging and love well are becoming more rare daily. Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that those people don't exist in the Church. I'm just saying that they are rare. Why is that? Have we gotten so caught up in the "doing"that we're doing little more then just going through the motions even if those motions are hurting more then helping?

Our trainer in the gym has brought a love for the gym into our lives because he has spent the last 2 weeks really training us. Showing us how to maximize our gym time by doing everything correctly. More then once I found myself in awe of just how much I had been doing wrong! And he lovingly and gently guided us. And I can tell the difference.

My life is far from perfect. I am a broken and sinful human being who's no better then anyone else. But I want to experience the same things that I do when I walk into the gym. I want to experience health. I want the church to be the place that people would want to come back to despite the bad and difficult reputation that it has. Can we do that?

The BIG Picture

2010-03-27T17:57:00.000-05:00

I find myself right now sitting in the back lounge of our rented tour bus surfing the internet and watching a "Deadliest Catch" marathon on Discovery. I have my own space, my own bunk, my own pillow, and access to just about anything that I need. It's by far the best way to travel. Seriously.

For those of you who don't know, my husband and I travel full time, mainly in the States, but all over the world. My husband is an illusionist. We will spend the next 9 months, collectively, on the road. It's a crazy life that I wouldn't trade for anything. But, being in a tour bus makes it incredibly fun and less draining. The life of us gypsy road warriors is far from glam. It's rough, it's exhausting, and it's incredibly rewarding. We have the opportunity to interact with thousands of people all over the world. Like I said, it's amazing.

But as I sit here alone in the back of the bus, I feel an overwhelming sense of peace. I feel like I'm right where God intends me to be despite how difficult it might be at times. In my humanness, I am likely to whine and get irritated with small things, but the big pictures is just that: BIG. A friend of mine made a statement regarding what he does (he's a singer) and states that we whine and complain about all the nitty-gritty things that aren't right on the road, but at the end of the day we get paid to do what we love. To do exactly what God designed for our lives. I thought about it. And I found myself one of those people. I tend to go out with good intentions, but in the end make the trip all about what I wanted or how it wasn't great...could have been better "if". And I get to travel the world, with my husband and friends, doing what I love. It doesn't get any better than this. It will never be glamorous, it will never make me rich and famous. But hopefully the big picture is something that will continue to remain just that. BIG. And I pray that God continues to let me be a part of it.

Dreaming of Size 4 Pants

2010-03-23T19:46:00.000-05:00

To say that working out (ie anything that requires me to break a sweat) is my nemesis is the understatement of the year. I loathe it. There have been so many times that I have thought about heading out for a jog or quick trip to the gym and ended up breaking into a cold sweat, while visions of dry heaving into the bushes made me panic. Like I said, I loathe working out.

But it's now officially the spring of 2010, which means that summer is just around the corner. And every woman in America knows that "summer" is followed by the two most dreaded words in the English language: "swimsuit season". Every woman knows that summers are the greatest time of the year, and the worst time of the year. It's the time that we grill out, play bocce ball on the lawn, and spend time with our friends and loved ones. It's also the time that we weep inside when our skinny friends (the one's who's bodies we secretly covet) decide to go boating at the lake or lay by the pool. I am one of those who weeps inside...or sometimes out loud.

But I'm working hard to make this year not a summer that I spend hiding in the air conditioning in sweats and baggy clothes. I want to take back what I used to have: a life. One of my favorite activities is boating all weekend with friends. I love to swim at the pool and get tan and just enjoy being outside in the hot sun. This is the year that I am going to wear a swimsuit. It's been 5 years since I've enjoyed the freedom, so I'm a little nervous. But I am taking the steps necessary to make it happen. I have been cutting out the junk food from my diet since November, went vegetarian 6 weeks ago, and now have an amazing trainer that I'm excited to meet at the gym 3 days a week. (I still panic a little at the thought of the gym, but am learning to love it). It's about being healthy, not just being thin.

So people (especially you ladies out there), I write this post for two reasons.
1. Stay with me and track my progress with me! It helps me to stay motivated and keep focused. I have some amazing friends here in Nashville that are such an encouragement and motivation. They help me not give up and fight to do whatever it takes.
2. If you find yourself wanting to hide in the corner at the thought of a gym or swimsuit, know that you're not alone. You're fears are normal. Now it's time to reclaim your body and your life. You are in control and can defy gravity if you choose. And remember that it's not just about being in shape, it's about being healthy.

Here's to getting healthier and dreaming of size 4 pants!

that "blogging" thing

2010-03-21T19:16:00.000-05:00

So here I am. Trying (hopefully not in another failed attempt) to start a blog. Not because it's just one more avenue for people to stalk my life, but because there are so many times that I've found myself wanting to tell people something that would take more then 140 characters on Twitter, and I have no real outlet. Because I travel full time, I am sharing my life not at home with friends and family, but chasing pavement with my husband and chihuahua. So this is seemed like a great way for me to be able to sit down in our nightly hotel somewhere in the world and chit chat with those who are interested in the details. And maybe a way for me to feel a sense of "normal" in my whirlwind life.

So, that being said, here is my 3rd attempt at the blogging world. :)